Fried PorkChop

I'm Like Sasquatch...

2008-11-19T16:41:00.001-08:00

Everyone hears about me, but no one has seen me. Mostly like Sasquatch, because I did exist at some point in the past. I have been spending the past few days trying to find ME again, the one that has been lost in a haze of working, and taking care of people, and running like the wind through a blinding blizzard of reality.

Well, I left off blogging a VERY long time ago, and that was mostly because I had a terrible case of cabin fever and the birds were singing, the breeze was blowing, and the sun was shining. It was all too much to let pass by while I stayed inside punching out sometimes intelligible words on this box.

I started work at the end of June at a summer camp, supervising in the kitchen. Well, somewhat supervising. My job was more to assist the cook with preparations and to lord my expertise over the heads of Mirek and Maya, my two underlings from across the globe. It didn't take much lording though, for these two were exceptional workers with great ethics, very fast learners to boot. It made my life much easier this summer than previous years, but it was still pretty hectic.

I had to arrive at work by 6 a.m. to help with preparations, serve up the food, then clean up after the children had left the dining room. Most often, we had trucks delivering supplies twice a week, and we had to unload them and put things where they belonged. Sweeping, chopping, stirring, waitressing... to say that I couldn't wait to leave there was the biggest understatement of the year.

I keep in touch with Maya and Mirek, for they had huge hearts and we spent a lot of time together on their days off. I have photos of both of them from when they came and stayed here overnight, and might post them sometime in the future.

We purchased a Wii mid-summer, and a Wii-Fitness to go with it for me. I spent every work break I had and days off on that thing. Gave up soda, cut back on junk food, changed the sizes of my portions. Losing 28 pounds was more than worth it for me, and I'm really glad that we made the investment.

If you will recall, there are pictures of me posted in certain spots on my blog. Pics of me with long hair. That was taken care of my first week at work when I cut it off to a long pixie version. By the end of summer, I had enough of the look.

With September ending, I really hacked it all off. Seriously all off. My hair is now a very short cut (the kind that is supposed to flip up in the back but I really don't care for it). Today, I went and had it touched up a bit and dyed. I'm still trying to figure out just what color my hair was changed to. Lol, not really. It is still a basic brown with thick golden highlights. It's not bad, and not far off from what I have been wearing since September.

I stopped working on August 26th, and we took the rugrats to Darien Lake for an overnight stay. They loved it, even if it did rain quite a bit while we were there and tent camping. Toad overcame some of his fears, and we found out that Princess is the biggest daredevil of us all. She was royally pissed when they told her she was too short for most of the thrilling rides.

I had roughly 5 days off total from work when I started babysitting 4 children for a friend. I drove 28 miles one way, pretty much 5 days a week, until October hit. The pay was okay, and the children weren't too hyper, unless I brought Buckwheat with me. For some reason, Buckwheat has determined that he couldn't get along with these children, leaving me with 4 screaming children most days while working with a newborn. So when I stopped babysitting in early October, I was mostly relieved. I could finally go back to wasting my days at the computer and be my miserable cave dwelling self again.

I received a call about a week and a half after stopping the babysitting by my friend, asking me to give her a hand for 2 days while her husband worked because she was ill. I went back to babysitting on a Thursday, and was thinking on Friday when I left that it was over for good.

I called my friend's hubby on that Saturday to ask if we were still able to get a dishwasher from them, and while that conversation was the intent of the call, I found out some other stuff that led me to call him back later that night for an update.

That call sealed my fate, for he asked me to come and sit with the guys while he tended to business. T-Bone went along with me, since it was night driving that I don't get along with, and we arrived just before 9 in the evening. We didn't get back home until 3:45 in the morning on Sunday. It was exhausting, but easy, since all of the children were in bed, including mine. The baby awoke occasionally, but it wasn't for long.

On that Sunday, he updated me fully and said that he was in a jam for a babysitter. Honestly, at that time, we needed the money. T-Bone's employer was curtailing every 4 days out of 14, which was leaving him shy a whole week's paycheck half the time. So I agreed, and showed up so he could go to work on that Monday.

I'm not going to go into details, it's not my place. I will say that I was there for a full month again before deciding that my time had come to make my exit. I did wind up quitting a day ahead of time, but for just cause. T-Bone played a huge part in it, and although I defy my husband a lot (his opinions are usually half-hearted suggestions anyway), this time I saw his point. His position at work could be in jeopardy over some events, and to me, his job was more important than the other guy's. Rude, I know. But, I have to be honest and get it off my chest, and I think that trying to get it out without mentioning vital things will make me feel better.

I miss the kids that I babysat for, and I honestly thought that I wouldn't. Firstly, they aren't my children. I don't bond with children that aren't mine, never really have, and never really will. But for some bizarre reason, even if I didn't bond in my sense, I did spend a lot of time with those children and that's hard to get rid of, bonded or not. I miss the baby sitting on my lap, her head resting in the crook of my knee while her feet pushed at my belly, cooing like crazy and waving her fists in the air. I miss the 2 year old guy and the way he always said "Not yet!", or the way that he would lay his head on my shoulder when I removed him from his crib in the morning and when putting him down for a nap. I miss their oldest daughter, and the look she always gave when she knew she was caught doing something that I was trying to get her out of the habit of. She liked to sneak into the refrigerator or take food and drinks from the cupboard without asking, usually making a huge mess if the deed was done quietly. I tried to instill in her that if she's hungry, just ask. If I say "no", it's probably for a reason. Not a proper food for the time of day, it was junk food, meal time was coming, etc. Especially, I miss the oldest child. Even though he could be a handful, it all seemed to go away when he willingly reached up to grab my hand when I would take him to school or pick him up. Or, when he would climb up on the couch with me in the late afternoon and sit there with his head on my arm while he watched T.V.

I'm not quite sure what this blog post was about to begin with, it really all came out in a haze and I'm sure that it doesn't follow any proper kind of flow. It's just a jumbled mess, much like my life has been since late Spring. There are so many things I want to say, and I know that I shouldn't. So many things I want to let people know that I experienced and felt, and I can't. So many things that were driving me to the brinks of depression on a daily basis, making me struggle to hold onto it all for the sake of not only my family, but someone else's too. I want to let other people know that I held on for the sake of their family too, and that I don't feel properly thanked. Those people can take it as they may, but if they really, really, thought about it, they too would realize that I went above and beyond to try to be a true friend by putting my life on hold, and by guiding their children. I don't want to be special, I don't want a medal, I don't want praise. I want to go back to that place where I'm not just THE BABYSITTER, which is what I became, and quickly. I was no longer a friend, a confidante, a shoulder to cry on. I was a functioning maid, and well, I guess since I was getting paid in cash that the money should be enough to fix my wounded ego.

I can honestly say that if this post is read, and offends anyone, it's for good reason. There is NOTHING bad in here about anyone, no names, no references, no innuendos. Just wounded feelings, and I'm sure that this will let me know just what level I was at.

Netflix, anyone?

2008-05-13T18:53:00.000-07:00

If anyone out there is looking to try Netflix for the first time, let me know and I will gladly offer you a One Month Free Trial Card!!!

I have four of them, and would love to share the joys of Netflix with others who love movies as much as we do.

The only hang up, is that you will need a credit/debit card in order to sign up an account. Let me guarantee you that we originally went with a 10 day free trial, and I was uber worried about giving them access to my bank account through a debit card.

Turns out, that I had nothing to fear! They never even attempted to start my first payment until the 11th day, when I verified that I would like to continue being a customer by queuing up more movies.

Others I have spoken with about Netflix have voiced many concerns, the top one being primarily the condition of the discs that we receive. Never. A. Problem.

These discs have always come to me completely immaculate, and have NEVER skipped. And I have received over 60 movies from them in 5 months.

The plan that we use allows us 3 discs at a time, unlimited. Meaning, that I literally have the potential to get around 30 discs a month, depending on how quick I am to return them. Try getting THAT many movies from a rental store for $18.01 a month!

Anyway, if you would like to try it, please let me know. Like I said, I have 4 cards, and I would gladly share my favorite place to get movies with you for free for one month!!

Just drop me a comment if interested, with your e-mail address. Or e-mail me. No biggie!

Laugh, I Thought I Would Die!

2008-05-06T16:16:00.000-07:00

Had a grand old time finding some funnies on the net.. these ones had me rollin' rollin' rollin' rollin'!

pioneeringinpa.blogspot.com

WANTED FOR THE FRIGHTFUL TORTURE of a RUTHLESS REDNECK

$13700

What's Your Blog Wanted For?

Oh. My. Word. I so cannot believe that they referred to T-Bone as a RUTHLESS REDNECK!! I mean, really. Who else could they have been referring to? The frightful torture part though, is bang on baby. ;)

23

Quite, immoral. Yes. Totally wrong. Borderline child abuse come to mind? Hellz yeah to all of the above. But admit it guys, we all need to be prepared for when the world is overcome with 5 year old zombies. I can take on 23 of them. Hope you guys got the rest.

$3865.00

T-Bone, keep this page bookmarked for proof when I bite the big one, start pushing up daisies, take a dirt nap. That way those scum suckers in the cadaver section that you are trying to hock my body to don't try to rip you off. See? I think about you honey!

62%

Ok, so I was prepared to "got your backs" with the 5 year olds. Not so much with the zombies. Seems that my aversion to creepy non-living things puts me at a great setback. I think my biggest downfall would come when T-Bone and I stopped running like madmen to pull a Shawn of the Dead. Oh yes, we would.

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na. (picture T-Bone and I chanting this while a zombie creeps up on us, then pausing...) And, I can guarantee that our asses are getting snagged by that zombie if he fails to respond appropriately, because we will stand there like two sitting ducks waiting for it.... *insert deadly zombie groan here*

Anyway, just wanted to do a quick post-by! YAY!!

Q & A, Hooray!

2008-05-05T09:21:00.000-07:00

Alright guys, I've been a bad blogger (as you all know) so those who dropped by were so surprised that I posted anything new at all, that most of you failed to leave a question! That's alright, I have a few of them to answer, and I will add a few from an e-mail that I received from a buddy yesterday.

So sit back, relax, and enjoy!

#1. If you had three wishes, what would they be? No wishing for money, love, or changing of past events.

This is a tough one, considering that most of my wishes normally stem from wanting to change something in the past, or for money to ease my burdens. But, I'm going to take an honest stab at it!

My first wish would be to live forever. Honestly. I fear death, mostly the not being here anymore is what scares me the most. I also fear that my loved ones will no longer have me here with them, and that I will miss out on special moments in their lives.

Second wish, to have a week long vacation in the Caribbean. I long to see the perfect blue of the waters, and would love to laze around on the beaches.

And third? I wish that I had the ambition to successfully lose the extra weight that I carry around. I know how to do it, I just can't seem to get the motivation to be successful at it.

#2. If you could change one thing that has happened to you in the past, what would it be? Why?

This is one of those questions that leaves me wishing for more wiggle room. I think, that to change it all, I wish that I had remained single when I was younger, which would have unlocked a whole chain of different courses in my life. I would have remained in school, gone to college, found a successful job, and probably wouldn't be where I am today. Although, oddly enough, I was thinking about this one last night as I soaked in the tub. The problem with wanting to go back and make that specific change, would be, obviously, that I wouldn't have my children, and I most generally wouldn't be with T-Bone today. THAT is one thing I would never change though, so I'm not so sure that even if I could change that part of my past, that I would. It took a long and precarious journey, with a ton of heartaches, to land me where I am today.

#3. If you could eat only one food for the rest of your life... what would it be?

Ahhh. This is one that hangs me up. As much as I love certain foods, I would never want to eat only that for the rest of my life. But, since I obviously have to answer, I would want it to be lasagna.

#4. If you were on Survivor or a similar show, what is the one thing that would send you home? What would you be unable to do?

It would be one of two things. Anything to do with heights, or anything to do with snakes. I get extremely paralyzed even going up a ladder, so I would never be able to conquer that fear. I have had to talk myself out of stupid little heights before, and I always hated the feeling of having my body frozen in fear. The second, snakes, would definitely send me home. My fear is so enormous, that I can't even handle dead snakes, stupid little run of the mill dead snakes in the road. My childhood friend knew how much I hated them, and when we were out on our walks she would pick the dead snakes up with a stick and chase me with them. Thank goodness I could run faster than her!

#5. What is one talent that you wished you had? Is it something you can learn or is it something you have to be born with?

I truly wish that I could paint. I'm talking, Rembrandt style. Or Picasso. I have always admired their talent, and wish that I could have it also. I think that I could learn it to a certain extent, most certainly. But to have the amount of talent that those guys had? You have to be born with it.

#6. What is your favorite way to spend a hot, lazy summer day?

With my family. On the beach, without a care in the world. Plenty of sunblock for the kiddies, a vast picnic spread, and a ton of fun in the sun. I love lazy summer days!

#7. If there was on trait that your exes had, and your hubby doesn't, and you wish he had it, what would it be?

Gee T-Bone, nothing like trying to hang yourself lol. We have discussed this one before, so it isn't anything that hasn't been brought up, or would be totally new to you. I guess that trait would have belonged to my ex-husband. He woke with the sun, hopped out of bed, got dressed, and hit the day. He wasn't one to laze around. I admire that you never seem in a hurry, but sometimes I wish that I didn't have to ask you to do things. But, you know this already. You have all the traits that I need to be a happy person, and obviously, my exes didn't. But I wouldn't mind if you took the reigns for a while, and made decisions for us. Like, plan a day for you and I where I don't have a single decision to make at all. I would absolutely love that!

#8. What's one trait that you dislike about yourself?

I hate that I look like my mother. I really do. Not that I don't think she has admirable looks or anything, but gosh.. I know where I'm headed in 20 years and really would have preferred for it to be a surprise!

#9. Worst injury you have ever had?

I broke my leg when I was 12. I slipped off a diving board, and landed really hard with my leg on the board itself. It hurt, but the worst part was not realizing it was broke, and going to climb up a ladder with that leg to get out of the pool. My stomach is just rolling thinking about it!

#10. What song do you want played at your funeral?

I would definitely vote for Life is Beautiful by Sixx AM. That song is truly, truly, a work in itself, and says everything that I won't be able to when I'm gone.

So, there's a bit about me. I will try to get pics off my camera soon, which will leave me with a lengthy post about them!

BAAAAAADDDD Blogger

2008-05-01T08:49:00.000-07:00

Yup, that be me. Between having no ambition, having too much ambition, having too much time on my hands, and having no time on my hands, I have managed to abandon my blogging duties.

But, I'm here. Momentarily. I can make no promises as to how long I will be here.

Alas, I shall give you some updates on what I have been doing.

I have managed to burn my skin not once, or twice, but at least four times in the past 2-3 weeks. I thought I would be uber cool and head outside in a black thin strapped tank top. I burned. Not a problem. Hubby mentioned that he found bikini top tan lines to be sexy. Uh huh. He mentioned it. So, I donned a bikini top, and headed for the yard. Right after already being burned once on my chest with that little black top. I burned. Again. I think my brains were on vacation that day. My left mammary is now purple in one spot where TOO much sun got to it. I'm hoping it will return to normal. I don't think I can live for the rest of my days with a purple splotch on my boob.

We did go to the circus. It was a very small affair. They had Shetland ponies, some dogs, and a snake. That was the end of the animals. They also had a juggler (he even juggled fire sticks), a contortionist, a lady on a trapeze, and a not so funny clown. It was an OK dig, but I think I could have found better things to do with my time that night.

I do have pics, they are still on my camera. As soon as I feel the need to bog down my computer, I will offload them. Or upload them. Or download them. I can't decide which I will be doing. But it will get done, eventually.

We have been spending a lot of time partying. Birthday parties, dinner parties, parties, parties... PARTIES! And I am looking at a few more coming up.

As it stands, my weekend for May 23rd thru the 26th is going to be so filled up that I won't know what to do with myself. The 24th? I have a financial class to go to, nearly 2 hours away. It lasts for 4 freakin' hours. But, I really do have to go to it. Which puts a huge damper on a weekend long Memorial party at a friend's. So, in between that class, I will be popping in for that party. Plus, the annual Canoe Regatta is that weekend, and I HAVE to take the kiddies to THAT. I'm exhausted just thinking of that weekend.

We are having a summer kick-off party here on June 7th, so I've been busy with mental plans for that.

I have been baking, and cooking, and reading. Tons of fun going on round here!

Decided to do a Q&A session. Post your questions, and I will answer them in a separate post!

Spring Has Sprung

2008-04-08T08:49:00.000-07:00

Which always makes me a very busy woman. I spend approximately 5 months out of my year holed up in my house because the weather absolutely sucks. So, when Spring does its thing, and finally... springs... I'm hell bent for some fresh air and then some.

So, where were we? Ahh, yes. My car broke down, days before we were to buy a new one. Miraculous in itself that I could afford one, and even more amazement given the fact that the car came from T-Bone's sister, which allowed us to borrow it to make it out to our car to get it home after it was repaired.

On Thursday, we brought our new car home. We spent a lot of time cleaning it out, it was supposed to be vacuumed before we picked it up, but it wasn't. So, my vacuum was allowed a very rare sugar high from all of the Nerd's® that it sucked up from the floor in the back.It took a lot of talking, scolding, and reprimanding before my vacuum calmed down enough for me to put it away for the night. I think it still holds some resentment for me.

Alright, it's time to bring on the car pics. We bought our blue Intrepid almost a year ago, for $400. It was running on 2 cylinders instead of 6, was blowing oil, and needed tires. Did I mention that it had extensive body damage? Extensive to the point that the hood was replaced, and it didn't match the car. White hood, blue car.. hmmm.. methinks someone was a tad color blind when they did that repair.

We needed a car badly, so we took it. It cost nearly $200 to get the cylinders back to 6, and for the oil to stop blowing. We replaced the tires. Since then, we have put a lot of money into that car. New rear struts on both sides (plus 2 new tires when the struts went and ruined the tires, both at separate times), a water pump, a radiator, and basic repairs. I was so tired of this car that it was pathetic. Plus, it just didn't match my ensemble on any given day. Blue and white is a hard thing for me to pull off.

So, let's say a hearty goodbye to Porkchop's old car (aka T-Bone's new work only car), and pray that she never has to drive through town again and have people mistakenly wave at her car, thinking she is someone else. Because, you know, so many people in our town drive a blue Intrepid with a white hood and a rescue light on the top. Really, I've had people wave to it, then lie to someone else and say it wasn't them. Hmm.. looks like [unnamed], stands like [unnamed], and [unnamed] waved at my car. While he was standing on the street with a girl who wasn't his woman. Just sayin', there was no way that I could be mistaken.

Sorry, getting sidetracked lol. Drumroll please....I present to you, old blue Intrepid with white hood, fender damage, and one mismatched hub cap. The back tire was a spare, so the matching rim is in the trunk with a flat on it. Hmm.. talk about us being prepared. We don't even have a spare tire in that car. Could be why I'm left on the side of the road sometimes. And yes, we live in the sticks, so the tires are always caked in mud. Gives it a decidedly rugged look, yes?

Alas, on to my new car. My baby. My car that wouldn't allow the front windows to roll down without them falling off the track. The car that T-Bone spent 4 hours working on the other day to fix those windows, just for the driver's side to fall off the track again last night. No biggie, fixable in the future. Are you ready to see my new car?
Oh, what's that? I forgot to mention that I bought yet another Intrepid? My bad. I did. We now have 2 Intrepid's. Very nice cars, and I love the way they drive. Mine is 3 years newer than the blue one.

After we cleaned it all out, T-Bone jokingly suggested that he could let me use something that he has had in the package since he received them as a gift years ago. An object that he refused to use because he never felt right about his vehicles, so they therefore, weren't worthy of it. He went looking for said item, and couldn't find it. I, on the other hand, knew exactly where it was, and rescued it from Buckwheat's closet immediately.

Ready to see what T-Bone looks like when he is "letting go" of something? Be prepared, it's a sad sight.
The poor guy. I almost didn't have the heart to allow him to bestow his "gift" upon my car. Then again, who am I kidding? I'm me, and I'm spoiled, and selfish, and.. and.. well.. you get the point.
So, I did what any good, self-respecting wife would do. I ~~promised him "adult favors"~~ stroked his ego and told him how unworthy I was of him. See the smile? He ~~lusts~~ loves me.

There they are. His pride and joy. His "not worthy of any other vehicle I ever owned no matter what I paid for it" Trans-Formers floor mats. And those bad boys are now mine all mine.
See? They were made for each other!

Now that I've updated you all on where I've been, here's where I will be tonight.

At the circus! I will take plenty of pics, and promise to post them shortly!

It's Raining, It's Pouring, & A Winner!

2008-04-02T07:24:00.000-07:00

Okay, I think I've made enough apologies for being MIA that I can skip it this time. I have had tons of reasons for not being here, but more about that later!

As you can see, here is my scale with my ass on it. Well, not just my ass, but all of me!! And yes, that does say 238 for those who can't see it clearly. So, we have a winner who was 8 pounds off. Asthmagirl, send me an e-mail and give me some details (like, do you even have a Target near you, because I can opt for a different gift card). Congratulations! The others had me wondering just what on earth it would feel like to weigh their guesses (like 179 lbs. by Hallie) and I'm pretty sure that Debbie guessed lower! Thanks for the participation, the first contest went over without a hitch. Almost.

On to the next portion of our program. We did the Easter scene with the runts, but it went over really choppy. They received their bikes on Saturday in spurts, since Princess decided to stay the night at her aunt's and not come home until mid-afternoon. They enjoyed them!

We had a nice spaghetti dinner that night, with leftovers for lunch on Sunday. We made Beezlenut Splashes (stolen from IHop) to go with their lunch. It's just Sprite soda, with cubes of Jell-o in it served in a clear glass. Here's a pic of my Beezlenut Splash tower!After lunch, we dropped in to my sister's to rescue another child that had spent the night. We returned home, finally gave them their Easter Baskets, then geared up to take them home. Uneventful, right?

Wrong. So wrong. About 5 miles outside of one of our drop off spots, we noticed steam escaping from the hood of the car. The temperature gauge was where it always is, so we plunged ahead. More steam, and 1 mile from our destination the gauge shot up towards the red line for hot. We made it to where we wanted to be, with the car steaming like a fire breathing dragon.
This pic is mild. Our car was literally engulfed in steam. Turns out that the seams in our radiator chose that precise moment to burst. There was no way to get the car home without a new radiator.

I tried to call my sister, and after an hour managed to get ahold of her. Meanwhile, I was regaled with the ex-MIL and ex-grandmother-in-law at their house. Watching a National Geographic channel soft porn episode. Really, I didn't care to see little Africans with penis gourds bouncing across the screen while sitting next to my exes.

My sister finally answered her call, and it turned out she was less than 10 miles away! YAY! So, her and her hubby showed up, he tried some stop leak in the radiator, but it wasn't holding. We headed home defeated.

Thankfully, we had made arrangements to buy a new car the week before. The money was in the mail to pay for it, and T-Bone's sister (who we were buying the car from) graciously let us use it. T-Bone made it to work on Monday, for a bit.

My sister called just before noon to let me know that her hubby was in a salvage center ripping a radiator out of another vehicle for our car. In the pouring rain. So I called T-Bone at work, so he could leave and meet her hubby at our car to help put it in. He had to finish up what he was working on first, so we arrived at our destination just before 2.

To find my sister and her hubby sitting in their vehicle. We geared up for a radiator installation, praying that it would work. Too late! He had managed to install it already, and was getting ready to leave.

So, T-Bone headed out with our car, I followed in the car we were buying, and my sister was close behind. We made it home without further incident.

A quick recap. Weight winner, Asthmagirl. Broken car? Pain in the ass. Making plans to buy a different car mere days before the current one breaks down? An upside. Having a sister-in-law who will let us borrow that car without having cash in hand? A lifesaver!!

Reflections, with a Twist (Read on!)

2008-03-28T04:37:00.000-07:00

I'm going to start this post off with a great picture of the baked oatmeal that I mentioned for one of the foods that I like to snack on, the post is here. I make this recipe at least once a week, sometimes twice. It is pretty dense, almost like a muffin bar. I like to grab it by the chunk and munch on it, but you won't find me turning my nose up at throwing some in a bowl, microwaving it, then adding milk and mixing it all together.

This recipe, courtesy of here, had to be adapted to suit my tastes. Of course, those tastes wouldn't have come in to play if I had enough oil for the recipe during one session and hadn't decided to switch it off to applesauce. Best unorganized thing that has happened to me in a while!

My suggestion is to use 1/2 of the oil called for, and replace the other half with the applesauce. This recipe is already sweet enough, so completely substituting out the oil will make it sickly sweet (in my opinion anyway, take it or leave it). One more thing, try to use the smaller sized quick oats (not the package size, I'm talking "oat" size). I made it for my sister, and the oats were huge, and I felt that it ruined the recipe.

Hope you guys enjoy the recipe as much as I do, it's semi-quick, super cheap, and easy to make. Plus, it feeds a lot. How can you go wrong with that? I refuse to go back to microwaved oatmeal (which I previously worshiped) or regular plain Jane oatmeal. Once you go baked, that's all it takes!!

Enough about food. That's really not why I'm here. I noticed the pic on my camera when I transferred the ones in the rest of this post off of it, and thought it would be a good time to share it. Voila. This is me, at 2 years old. I'm sure you are asking why it matters that I dug that far back into my childhood for this post. Hush, it's a progressive post. I had to start somewhere. Plus, I want you guys to think that I'm really super cute and adorable.

Somewhere along the way, I took a liking to food. Junk food. Lots of it. So, that perfectly chubby-but-fit 2 year old, managed to plump up a bit by the time she was 10.I would be the one on the left of the screen. With the funky pale yellow shirt. See all that pudge straining against my t-shirt? That was the product of 8 years of eating whatever the hell I wanted, when I wanted. I shouldn't be so harsh on myself, I really could have blown up like a balloon with the food that I liked to pack away.Fourteen. *sigh* What a beautiful age that was. I still had the makings of a "big boned gal", but I. Was. THIN. And this is the Porkchop that T-Bone fell madly in love with. Don't mind the slightly bad hair, it got better for a while. Pardon the interruption while I cringe. *Cringe* *Cringe* Okay, I think I'm over it. Yes, that is me. Yes, that is a wedding dress. And NO that is not the man I was marrying. That was my dad. Notice the short, stylish hair. Mine, not his. The still *mostly* thin body. Please keep in mind that I married extremely early, I was nearing 17 in that pic, and I was 3 months pregnant. Blah blah blah, too young, blah blah where were your parents. Now that we have that out of the way, and I decline to answer those questions, we can skip them. *wink*

A little footnote (or is it a side note, since I'm barely through my post? you can choose). When I am single, or in any sort of a non-live-in relationship, I'm thinner. I eat less, I have more energy, and the freedom to fill my mind with whatever I like that doesn't pertain to the rooming with the opposite sex variety. Once I get settled in, the fat moves in like an uninvited guest, and invades every last piece of me. It's true. I can prove it.I have to admit that this pic in particular makes me want to build a time machine, travel back over 10 years, and kick the ever loving snot out of the woman standing right there. You know, the one with the baby on her hip, the 8 month pregnancy bump, and the awful hair. Very awful hair. My oldest was almost 11 months old in that pic, and I was pregnant again. Must be that I never realized how it happened the first go round. Anyway, that pic doesn't prove that I was fat, although I was. Not just pregnant, but F.A.T. I gained 70 pounds with baby number 1, and managed to lose maybe 20 pounds of it before getting myself knocked up again. You do the math, and I can guarantee you that this pic above had me sporting all of those 70 pounds again, plus some!Let's fast forward a good five years. Through the diapers, the feedings, the birth of 3 total children, the loss of one, and a messy ordeal that left me moving back in with my mother. I don't think I mentioned that during the "bad" pregnancy, I lost 20 pounds during the 6 months that I should have gained at least half of that. I was malnourished due to blood loss, and climbing back to something resembling healthy was a long haul for me. The picture above shows me at ten pounds over the ideal weight for a woman of my height and body mass index. TEN FREAKIN' POUNDS, and not a single person could walk by without asking me if I was sick. A few even ignorantly asked what kinds of treatments I was going through that would cause me to look so ill. Let's just say that the money I paid for a fitness trainer to point out a couple of years after this picture was taken that my ideal weight was less than what I weighed in that pic had me wanting to throttle him. There is no way I can hit my target weight and maintain any semblance of looking healthy. Been there, done that, and have the pictures to prove it, somewhere. This one isn't the best, but it shows the thin.Here I am at my sister's wedding a long time ago, but maybe 3 months after the previous picture. I had managed to gain 10 healthy pounds in 3 months, and was looking the best I have ever been.

Alright people, let's fast forward again. To a time where I have been in a comfortable relationship for almost 4 years. Of course, the fat has moved in, as I've mentioned in other posts. But, just how much fat? Muahahaha, I think I just started myself with my first blog giveaway.

Listen up people. I will show a couple of current pics. And, I must say, that my sister, T-Bone, Shell, and Sara MUST be excluded from entering, in order for it to be fair. The person who comes closest to guessing the correct weight just from these pics alone, will receive a gift-card from Target. The contest will run through the weekend, ending Sunday night. If more than one person guessed the same thing, or were the same distance from the actual weight, I will use a random generator to choose the winner.

On with the pics, my dears!Backside shot. I'm the one with the non-graying hair. :)Wedding pic, taken 2 years ago.
And, of course, I'm the taller one with the blonde streaks.

I really don't have any pics that show me better, but after the contest is over I will have T-Bone take a full body for me to post.

So, the rules.

1. Leave a comment with your guess on what I weigh. Really... I will not be offended. At all. Well, just don't say like 600 pounds. Then I might have to hunt you down and gut you like a fish. But we won't have that happen, right? RIGHT?

2. Feel free to blog about the contest, but it is not necessary in order for you to enter.

3. Anyone found canoodling with Sara, Shell, T-Bone, or my sister to try to get an accurate guess will be disqualified. :) Let's keep in the spirit of fair play, shall we?

Looking forward to pulling some shock and awe faces, along with a ton of laughing (I'm sure) at your guesses!

***Update*** I am 5'9". And, please don't ruin the contest by posting that you think weight guessing is rude. If that is how you feel, even after I asked for it, then please don't leave a comment. And no, I haven't had anyone say that.. just want to clarify it before it happens. :)

About Me

2008-03-27T10:45:00.000-07:00

I was tagged a LONG time ago by Jessica over at The Barn Bums, and for some reason I could never find this tag when I wanted to blog about it. Guess what? I found it. I deserve a medal or something! Enjoy.

A. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning.

B. Each player answers the questions about themselves.

C. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5 people and post their names, then goes to the blogs and leaves them a comment letting them know they’ve been tagged.

What I was doing 10 years ago: *sigh* Ten years ago, I was a mother of 2 little guys, with a new pregnancy under my belt. I was married to Hubby #1, wanting desperately to move (I swear, the house I lived in was haunted and I wanted OUT), and I had no goals in life other than making it through another day full of dirty diapers, vomit, and screaming little ones. Barney, Teletubbies, and Jay Jay the Jet Plane headed my T.V. viewing schedule. I was desperate for something else, but resigned to the path that I chose.

5 Things on my To Do list today: Keep my sanity, drink more water, wait for T-Bone to get home from work, go shopping for the rest of my Easter stuff (which we are celebrating this weekend), and do laundry.

Snacks I enjoy: Oreo Cakesters, all the way baby. Those things rock! Pepperoni & Cheese, Dove Truffle Eggs (thanks Tracy!), Baked Oatmeal, and Jell-o.

Things I would do if I were a Billionaire: I would go on a Cruise to the Bahamas (even though I am deathly afraid of cruise ships/ocean liners), visit Europe (even though I am deathly afraid of planes), pay off my debt, buy a new home, put money into a fund for my children with strict regulations that they are to receive ONLY a stipend a month that would require them to hold a job in order to survive (I'm evil, but I don't believe that children should be HANDED everything, that they should work for what they want), buy a new car, donate to find a cure for Breast Cancer & HIV/AIDS, dole out some money to each of my siblings, T-Bone's siblings, and my parents, along with my wondiferous grammy. I would have T-Bone quit his job, and pursue a career in something that he can do on his own time, so that he isn't a slave to "the man" any longer.

3 of my Bad Habits: I drink Mountain Dew like it is going out of style, I smoke like a chimney (less during the winter since we smoke outside and it's too damned cold!), and I eat wwwaaayyyy too much. Oh, and I swear a lot. More than I should, but I'm not changing that!

5 places I have lived: I have only lived in 2 places for more than a month or so, which would include a small town in NY that is 7 miles from where I now live in PA. I have spent time in Nebraska, Indiana, and North Carolina for a few weeks/month with intentions to NOT return to NY at the time, which is where I lived. I always found my way home, and have no intentions on leaving. But.. I would LOVE to live in Indiana!!

5 jobs I have had: Ugh, I so don't want to go here. Ok, ok.. here goes. I have been a waitress, on more than one occasion. I have been a Data Entry Rep for a credit card company, I have been an Error Processing Rep & 800 phone number installer for MCI, I did a stint of nearly a year and a half as a laborer in a fabricated board plant, and I am currently a seasonal kitchen supervisor at a summer camp that has been manned by women in my family for 4 generations. The piece de resistance? I worked at McDonald's, right before Buckwheat was conceived.

Would you like fries with your shake??

Okay, that's a ton about me. Now I wanna hear from Shell, Sara, T-Bone, Tracy, and my sister. I'm waiting. :)

Back In the Saddle Again

2008-03-26T08:46:00.000-07:00

While doing my daily blog rounds, I noticed a post here that made me feel ashamed. Wretched. A bad blogger, to say the least. I didn't go MIA to look for sympathy, and have people calling for me to return to the masses. It was just a matter of being busy, then being lazy. Which happens a lot for me. So, without any further ado, here's a general recap of what I have been up to.

A LONG time back, we went to dinner with my sister, to celebrate my nephew Potter turning 13. Here are a couple of pics from that day.Here's my nephew Potter with the gifts that we got him. A pair of exercise sweats, and a Yankee's (his fave team) t-shirt. The lady holding up the t-shirt is my mom.
This is me with my niece Tookie. Not my fave pic of me, but I'm just keepin' it real.

I have a ton more pics from the dinner, but I really need to keep this post short, my sister just called and asked me to go somewhere with her, so I need to get ready soon.

T-Bone loves to pose, and found the opportunity with the next pic while we were visiting at some friend's a while back.
As you walk down the stairs to the basement at my friend's house, you are greeted with this nasty sight. Every damned time, it scares the hell out of me, and I know it's there. It catches me off guard. It is normally covered with the blue t-shirt dangling around its neck to keep the little ones from being scared out of their gourds. I can see why.I really don't think that I have ever posted pics of my older guys on here. Not because I love them less, or fail to take pics, it's mainly because things are pretty uneventful when they are around, so blogging ideas go elsewhere. Here is a pic that I managed after 5 (count them.. FIVE) tries to stop them from fooling around. The first pic, Princess was goofing off. The second pic? Toad was goofing off. The third?? Buckwheat. T-Bone wasn't looking in the fourth, and I was at my wits end. Finally, Buckwheat stood (I was assuming that he was heading out and offing the pic process) and went to stand behind Daddy. I managed THIS pic, and I'm seriously thinking of having it used as one of my pics for my calendar next year!
St. Patty's Day dinner went off without a hitch, as always. And it turns out, that Buckwheat loves corned beef! Here he is with his "corned beef tongue" as he poses like a ham. Or corned beef. Either way, he was posing!
On Saturday, our local town held an Easter egg hunt. Here is Buckwheat with his stash, sitting with his cousin "Eggie" as he calls him. They both had a blast!

Saturday night, we went to T-Bone's sister's for Easter dinner. His brother was up from Pittsburgh, so we all got together, had dinner, then played some games. Somehow, we all wound up looking like this....
T-Bone's sister, "Aunt E-Moggy". The hat lit up all the way down the back.
Uncle Kenny, in full Disney World Pirate get out. Notice the beads wrapped around his "beard" (gag, seriously.. I don't like that thing)? He's chillaxin' in that pic.This was actually a high hat with stripes, that had long dangly goofy ears. T-Bone is tying them up around the top of that hat in this pic.One more of Uncle Kenny, wearing the Princess Pirate Mickey Mouse ears. This was right before the "pick his nose and wipe it on E-Moggie's pants" episode. Gagged me out. Hardcore.

Anway, I have to be running, my sister is on her way. I might possibly be back later with a second post for the day! *gasp*

Menu... Interrupted

2008-03-17T12:04:00.000-07:00

Menu Plan Monday is being rescheduled until I get a handle on a couple of bills, and get Easter out of the way. It's not a big thing, I'm just going to float on through (to the other side.. do do do) with what I have in my cupboards. Which, I mentioned last week, is a ton. So we are still eating pretty danged skippy around here, but my poor menu planning is suffering. And so is my sanity. I've been waiting until the last minute to figure out what to have for dinner. The entire reason I started menu planning was to avoid that, and here I sit. In this deep, dark hole.. called "what's for dinner". I can tell you this much baby, it ain't beef.

Oh, wait. It is. Corned Beef. Happy St. Patty's Day bloggers! Me, being the family traditionalist that I am (and read that closely, I said family traditionalist not Irish traditionalist), have already started the Corned Beef, Cabbage, Carrots, and Potatoes that I whip up every single March 17th. I actually don't care for Corned Beef, but T-Bone loves it, and it only happens once a year, unless I get a great deal on Corned Beef (like I did the other night) and buy more. I'm looking at two helpings of the stuff within the near future. Somebody save me!

Anyway, this post is completely random. I really don't have a topic of choice today, just like yesterday. And the day before. Oh, and the day before that too. But it's all good, for some reason, even boring blog material captivates some people. Only some. But that's good enough for me!

My sister showed up last night, her hubby wanted to try out one of his newer guns. Since we live out in the country, and they live in town, it seemed logical that they came up so he could fire off a few rounds. T-Bone loves nothing more than playing with fire arms, so he was in heaven. Even more so in heaven, because he loves to entertain.

As always, my poor sister was trying to run out the door to leave, and T-Bone was trying to hold her back with another "Hey, have you seen this?". He is so horrible with that. Mainly, he stops people who are trying to leave with his collection of guns (which stalls them for a good hour) but since my sister and her hubby had already been ~~bored~~ delighted with the guns on a previous visit, they were spared.

Instead, T-Bone tried to stall them with pictures. I think that my sister and her hubby drew straws on the way up here to see which one would escape to the vehicle with the kids and wait, while T-Bone ~~held the other hostage~~ entertained. My sister must have lost, she stood in the doorway after her hubby escaped, waiting impatiently for T-Bone to show her some ancient cartoon caricatures that were drawn of his family eons ago.

She escaped in a pretty timely fashion, if you ask me. Lucky her, I get ~~bored to death~~ to be regaled with T-Bone's shenanigans every day.

The things we do for ~~lust~~ love.

I was dragged out of bed at ~~nine~~ seven this morning by a peculiar phone call. I was so ~~tired~~ confused by the call that I had to listen to it twice. And what's even better? I only caught half of it on the answering machine. Because, I, like the dumb ass that I am, picked the phone up halfway through the caller's message, and merely sat listening to him. Yeah. I did. I LISTENED TO THAT POOR SOUL WHO THOUGHT HE WAS STILL TALKING TO MY ANSWERING MACHINE. And I didn't even know it. It's one thing to screen calls, it's another to be the silent breather on the ~~water bed~~ grassy knoll that's hanging onto your every word because she thinks she is listening to her answering machine. Through the handset. It was such a duh moment. I hope that guy never finds out, he will never think the same of me again.

Anyway, on with my story. He was telling me my answering machine about how he wants to give away his second camper at the camp grounds behind us, and would like for us to take it. Pull it out, scrap it, keep it, leave it, use it, LIVE IN IT, just please take it off his hands. He can't afford the 2 lot rents at the camp ground, and he has a perfectly functional camper that is a tad bigger because they built onto it.

Let me say, I was thrilled. Must have been thrilled enough to be one of those phone breathers, but that is besides the point. This camper is nice, it's big, and it is currently on a lake front spot at the camp grounds. And the owner would love for us to come back. New seasonal campers can't get a lake front unless they go and buy a lake front camper that is for sale. And we were just handed one, for free. I can't wait to see T-Bone's reaction tonight when I tell him!

Better yet, I think I'm just going to let him read this and find out how his buddy from NJ must have thought that our answering machine was alive and breathing while he left his message. Good grief, I'm going to be razzed about this one.. FOR A LONG TIME.

Keep me in your thoughts people, I'm going to need it!

My Fall From Psychotic Pt. 8

2008-03-13T09:41:00.000-07:00

Even with all of the drama and horrible things happening that year, my pregnancy was going alright. As I neared 26 weeks, I started getting scared. Worrying incessantly whether the baby would make it past that mark, or if it would be Keegan all over again.
My high risk doctor knew my history, including what happened with Keegan. And somehow, he planned to keep things calm from my 24th week on, without my knowledge until my 24th week appointment.

To be continued....
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Before I launch into Pt. 8, for those of you who haven't read the other 7 parts, I suggest that you do one of 2 things. One, read the other 7 installments, so that you are current. Or two, skip this post. Without reading the other parts, you aren't going to fully grasp the idea behind this post, and might find it a tad confusing. Or maybe you won't, I can't predict that. BUT.. I am pressing on with the "Fall from Psychotic" series after a fair amount of pressuring from fellow bloggers who did read my back posts, and are anxious for the next step. Oh, and for T-Bone. He loves to read about himself. I still love ya, baby.
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Stopping all of the medications that I took on a daily basis took a lot of getting used to. I not only stopped taking them, but I did it in the worse way possible. I went cold turkey. That isn't something that you can do with Xanax and Lithium. The Prozac wasn't a problem, but getting used to life without the other two took a ton of adjusting. When my ordeal was stabilized, I vowed to never take an antidepressant again.

My doctor had other thoughts. He knew what kind of stress I was under as I neared that dreadful 26 week mark, and suggested at my 24th week appointment that I consider ramping back onto antidepressants for the remainder of my pregnancy.

Sure, I was worried. I was stressed. I cried quite a bit when the thoughts of losing another child overwhelmed me. But, under no circumstances, was I going back on those pills. I was stronger than that. I could do without it. And somehow, I took one for the team, sucked it up, and plowed on without them. The whole time, I reassured myself that things would be fine, it was just a state of mind, that nothing was going to happen to this baby.

In the back of my mind, the thoughts that doomsday was approaching still riddled my waking hours. I soothed myself with a very hard knock to reality. I survived the death of a premature child once, if it happened again, I could deal with it. I was strong. I wouldn't like it, and it would probably end my child bearing days forever, but for the sake of my sanity, I pressed on with these thoughts raging inside my head like a thundering storm cloud.

My 26th week came and went, with nothing major going on other than an occasional urinary tract infection. The sense of doom never left me, even as I felt my little one growing bigger and healthier. It never left when late in my 6th month, the baby decided to lodge his head in my canal and leave it there for the duration of my pregnancy. In fact, I think that maneuver made my impending doom seem worse, for the awful pains I would get when he moved had me wanting to throw in the towel on more than one occasion.

A month and a half before the little guy was due, T-Bone was out of town on a work trip to meet potential and existing clients for his mill. The very same night that he settled down in Ohio, I swore my water broke. I awoke from a nap to find my water bed soaked in a huge puddle beneath me. I scoured the bed, checking for leaks, and realized that there was no way the bed had left that puddle. I called my mother, and had her take me to the doctor's.

My water didn't break, or spring a leak, but the little guy had decided to use my bladder as a punching bag. Embarrassing as it was to find out I had no control over my bladder anymore, it was a huge relief to still have my waters intact. I was not ready to deliver this baby yet.

By the end of December, I was wishing that it was over. I could barely move anymore, my sleep was almost zero, and my body was being abused in ways I never thought possible. And that was my 5th pregnancy, to boot. As January dragged on, I found myself faced with the same information each time I visited my doctor. Things are looking great, you will make it to your due date.

A week and a half before my due date, I went in for an appointment and was seen by my doctor's assistant, instead of himself. And thank the powers that be for small miracles. The lady started my usual internal, and immediately went into shock. She looked me in the eye, and said "Do you realize that this baby has its head lodged in your canal? I can feel it!" I gave her my corporate eyebrow, and responded with something nice along the lines of "you think you can feel it, try being me" when all I wanted to say was "Hey, no shit?!? Really?? And here I thought that I was passing a bowling ball of a kidney stone!"

I can't dis this woman, as much as I'd like to. She immediately called the doctor in, who was in the building but busy elsewhere. She looked him in the eye, and said "I really think that you should put this poor lady out of her misery and take this baby. She's so uncomfortable that she can barely walk! There's no way she's going to make it through the next week in any sort of comfort."

Without blinking an eye, he told the lady to set me up to be induced after the weekend. But, but.. it was Friday! I wasn't ready! Yes, it hurt. And yes, it was uncomfortable. But labor and delivery was always something I could never get my head around. I knew how much it hurt, and I didn't want to do it. No way, Jose.

I told T-Bone when I got home that he could be expecting an early February baby. Great, he knew that. So I wowed him a bit more, and offered a February 1st baby. He was ecstatic. He was in more of a rush to have this baby out in the real world than I was.

The weekend was pretty uneventful, a lot of cleaning and arranging before we left for a couple of days. Monday morning hit, and I woke with butterflies flitting around the enormous baby in my belly. The time was here. There was no turning back.

We arrived at the hospital when we were supposed to, and I was hooked up to the endless supply of machinery. As the baby's heartbeat thumped throughout the room, I lay there and wondered when the pitocin was going to be delivered.

The doctor showed early that morning, totally to my surprise. He waltzed in and produced a pair of gloves out of thin air. Now, let me say that this guy has a horrible sense of humor. Actually, he doesn't even have one. He had no bedside manner either. My appointments with him always went the same way. Few words, nothing but the facts ma'am.

So when he looked me in the eye, and announced that he was "here to break my vater" (did I mention he wasn't American?) I recoiled in fear. But, but... WHY?!?!? I moaned from my spot on the bed. A queer look passed over his face. "Because we want to have this baby before 5:00". Again I moaned my Why's. "Everybody goes home at 5. This baby needs to be out so we can all go home!" I took a closer look at his face to see why he looked so hideous, and realized with horror what I was seeing. The man was... smiling. Grotesquely, of course. But he was still smiling. The first I had seen since meeting this man so many months ago.

My water was broken, I was hooked to an IV and had pitocin shuttled through my veins, and things were OK for maybe an hour. Then my world was rocked.

The contractions were nasty, and they were hitting fast. It was hard to focus on breathing, since my room had suddenly turned into a 3-ring circus. My mother was there, and she brought my niece as a reminder to her of what happens when you have unprotected sex. Both of T-Bone's sisters were there, anxious to see their new nephew brought into this world. And.. my cousin Kimmy was there. Oddly, since she really hadn't talked to me EVER. Her family decided I must be OK about the time that I started going with T-Bone. They had a soft spot for him. My cousin worked in the hospital, and happened to have some time on her hands, so she dropped by.

The pains rocked my body as everyone in the room guessed how much the baby was going to weigh. Everyone guessed in the 8 pound range. Fine by me, my other 2 boys were in the 8 pound range. Then T-Bone opened his mouth, and granted himself a stare full of daggers since I couldn't talk through my contractions. He announced that his little boy was going to weigh 9 pounds, 3 ounces. That man had a death wish.

T-Bone was snagged by my mother to go for a cigarette, and I thought that it was fine, nothing was changing. I was still out of it from trying to focus on not screaming and moaning in front of an audience, so I barely heard him. My mother started to walk past, and slowed after taking a look at me.

"Oh no. You have to push, don't you?" She asked, in awe.

Well, no. I hadn't thought about it. Until that moment. And all of a sudden, I had to push so bad that I couldn't stand it. She waves me off, saying that they have time for a cigarette, and will return. I floundered around a bit, trying to get comfortable, until they returned.

As they walked in, so did the nurse. She asked how I was doing, and I muttered that I had to push. Nah, not time yet. You're fine. I so wanted to kick her. She conceded to to do an exam, and all of a sudden things went into a downward spin. She looks up at me from between my knees, and announces "do not push", she was going to get the doctor. The baby was set, and so was I.

As the doctor rushed in, T-Bone's sisters, my cousin, my mother, and niece, rushed out. They did their thing with the bed, everyone got into position, and less than 5 minutes later Buckwheat came screaming into the world.

T-Bone cut the cord, and the nurse handed Buckwheat over to T-Bone so that his aunts and grandmother could see him. In the hall, the 2 new aunts started crying copiously, along with T-Bone, as they marveled at the little guy that was now their nephew. T-Bone's oldest sister had their mother's profile laser etched into a medallion on a chain, and she was wearing it that day. As she gazed at her new nephew, she kissed his cheek with the medallion, and muttered that grandma was watching down on him.

The doctors did their thing with me, and I was ready to go back to my room. T-Bone waltzed in after I was settled, and announced that Buckwheat weighed 9 pounds, 5 ounces. Man, he was so close.

We arrived home the day after I delivered, since all systems were a go. As we arrived, we took the baby upstairs to meet T-Bone's aunt. And that's when I found out what T-Bone had never told me.

As she gazed at Buckwheat, she nonchalantly asked T-Bone if we had the paternity test done. I looked at her in shock, and asked what she was talking about.

"The paternity test that T-Bone promised his mother before she passed away. Did you get it done, or do you plan to do it soon?"

T-Bone shrunk in horror, and for once.. was at a loss for words.

To be continued....

If I Were...

2008-03-12T10:06:00.000-07:00

If I were a sea critter, I would be...
An electric eel. 'Cuz I'm so damned ELECTRIFYING.

If I were an animal of the African grasslands, I would be...A Jaguar. Chic spots, and killer eyes. I would be IRRESISTIBLE.

If I were a bird, I would be...A Hummingbird. Small, fast, and I fit in your pocket. Every man's dream. :)

If I were a dog, I would be...The Taco Bell Chihuahua. Free Taco Bell? I'm all over it baby.

If I were a kitten, I would...PUUUURRRRRR. And not just behind closed doors, either.

If I were a vehicle, I would be....
A Humvee. Use me, abuse me, and my motor will keep revvin'.

If I were the weather, I would be...A tornado, with lightning. Dark, unpredictable, I come in with a whir of winds and leave an aftermath, everyone knows I've been there.

If I were a million things, I would still be me. And a million things are me.

But if I were you...I definitely wouldn't be...
ME.

And we wouldn't want that, now would we?

So.. tell me.. what would you be?

Annie Annie Bo Bannie...

2008-03-10T09:25:00.000-07:00

Attention customers: There will be no Menu Plan Monday post this week. I repeat... No Menu Plan Monday post this week. Cash is a tad tight, with bills flying in every direction. Plus, I have 4 brand new bikes to buy for Easter, and need to tighten down the hatches. The upside is, I have enough food in my house to kill an elephant after it's been on a 3 week hiatus, so we will be eating well for the week (possibly two, depending on how next week looks with bills).

On one hand, I'm happy to see the bills being paid (for once, I hate paying bills), but on the other.. I like the suspense of having to meet deadlines with my bills. Only problem is, I'm sure it's ruining our credit. And, I'm having to spend extra money because of late fees. So I'm going to suck it up like a big girl, and pay them on time, so that I have one less worry. I've even thought about having my monthly bills deducted straight from the checking account. I know, daring right?

Anyway, on with the show! I've been tagged. Sometimes I feel like the slow kid in freeze tag, who is always it because they can't run with the big dogs. That's what being tagged says to me. But.. it also says that someone thought of me, and for that.. I'm grateful. So, this fat kid is going into this next tag head long. Enjoy! P.s.- Thanks Tami!

1) You must post these rules on your blog before you answer the questions. 2) You need to list one fact about yourself using each letter of your MIDDLE name. If you don’t have a middle name use your maiden name instead. 3) When you are finished with your answers, you need to tag one person for each letter of your middle name.

M- Most people I know think I'm crazier than hell.

A- Annie is my name, and APATHY is the game.
For those who can't read this, it says "The opposite of good is not evil. The opposite of good is APATHY". And, for those who have no clue what apathy is, ask me if I care. *hint*

R- Raggedy Ann is the one name I loathe being referred to as.

I- I can go from 0 to Bitch in 2.3 seconds.

E- Everything I do in life, centers around this man...
This was taken on Christmas Day, the little guy is his cousin's son. The guy loves kids, can you tell?

Lucky me, I get to tag 5 people. Alright guys, you know who you are. My sis, My hubby, Sara, Shell, and hmmm let's shake it up a bit this time and throw in Tracy, from Faerie Mom. Hop to it, I'm waiting. And no, the photos aren't necessary. I just found that I like the tags this way, it stirs things up a bit!

I'm Done, and I Won It

2008-03-08T16:59:00.000-08:00

Look at that, good blog readers, you get a 2 for 1 post today! I have some material that I have been meaning to post for a few days, plus some new stuff.

First, I entered a contest last week over at Di's blog, you might remember this post. Well, guess what. I won. Oh yeah, baby! So, when T-Bone walked in from getting the mail on Thursday, and had a huge envelope marked "media" in his hands, I got super excited. This is what I pulled out of the package...
I absolutely loved the way this package came in the mail. Being a huge Forensics fan, this type of bag was RIGHT UP MY ALLEY!! I loved it so much, that I couldn't help but take everything out and take pics so that all of you lovely people can see what was inside.At the very bottom, is the lovely evidence bag. You have the yellow envelope marked "documents enclosed" that made me feel like an uber important type of person. No clue why, it just did. There is a thank you card from Di, and the book My Soul to Keep by Melanie Wells. Attached to the book, is a sticky that says "Just released Feb. 5th!" with an awesome squiggly line under it. I love this woman's handwriting!Here is a solo shot of the "evidence" bag that everything came in. I swear, if a tornado were coming and I had one thing to save other than my family, this bag would be it. It's just too neat to leave behind!A close-up of the book itself. I really can't wait to start reading it, but I must pace myself. I'm currently reading John Grisham's The Innocent Man, plus T-bone bought The Appeal, also by Grisham, for me yesterday. I think he's trying to hint for me to get off the computer. Point noted, NOT TAKEN. :)Here's a top view of the card that Di sent me. I thought it was the cutest!
"Annie, Enjoy! Please let me know how you like the book!" Signed, Di. With her website addy, of course. Www.liveandletdi.com. It's her new site, as she boasts in this card!And, my warm and fuzzy feeling maker "documents enclosed" envelope. I love that green! It just screams.. LOOK AT ME!!!I bet you were wondering what was inside the "documents enclosed" envelope. Hey, so was I! It's a small world, ain't it? Yeah, anyway. Enclosed, was a sheaf of papers that outline the book, with some background information. See the funny gray-ish smudge looking thing in the blue bar at the top of the page, about 2 inches from the left corner? Can you guess what it is? It's a fingerprint!! I was so stoked to see that, with the whole Forensic thing addiction that I have.

That's all that I have for that part of the post. I really can't wait to read the book, and once it's finished I will leave my aye or nay on it right here. Don't forget to drop by Di's blog, she's a great lady!

Okay, this next part isn't for the weak stomached. Or the faint hearted. In fact, if you value your life, you might not want to read any further. I won't think any less of you for turning back right now, and never returning.

To hell with that, you know I will hold a grudge and come hunting you down. So suck it up, fasten your seat belts, and fear the ride. Oh yes, fear it.

Did I ever mention that we acquired the house we live in absolutely free? And that we pay nothing more than a mere $100 tax for the state of PA once a year? No? Well, I must have felt that you didn't need to know. But it's a crucial part of evidence in what you are about to see below.

You see, you can't get something for nothing. Nope, you definitely can't. So, what we wound up with is no mansion. In fact, it isn't even a damn mini-condo. What it is, is a fashioned monstrosity made to resemble living quarters. No, really. Okay, wait, I'm lying. It's liveable, by far. But.. I left a really nice apartment that I adored to no end for this place, and it needed work. A lot. So much, that I cringe at the thought of what we still need to do.

Nearly 4 months ago, we purchased paint for Buckwheat's room. We knew it needed it, so I figured if I had it hanging around, it would get done in a timely manner. I don't think that nearly 4 months is a timely manner, but hey. I tackled it today. Hardcore.

Before I show you a pic of his room, please keep in mind that we didn't intend to use this room for anything other than storage until it was entirely remodeled. Then, a friend of ours moved in with us last March, and those plans were thrown out the window. And when he left, I moved Buckwheat into it. It was serviceable.. but I. HATED. IT.

Here's why, get ready for the shock and awe portion of this program.
This was Buckwheat's bedroom. From the doorway (which, the door isn't there, I removed it and replaced it with a baby gate). If you look straight in, you will see the shabby curtains, the water damage down the walls from year's ago that have since been fixed, and the funky non-matching colors. Absolutely horrific. I cringed to even look down the hallway and see this lurking at the end of it.Standing in his room, and looking to the left, you would be met with this view. An open closet. This boy has so many toys, along with the other 3 runts, that it was literally spilling over. And here's a nice vanity shot of the smoke stained walls (we don't smoke inside, but the previous occupants did), with a ragged curtain edge thrown in for free. Just looking at what I put up with is making me want to hurl myself off the closest bridge. What was I thinking?!?!Here is the wall above his bed. At some point last September, I acquired a buzzing bug up my ass and took some free paint from my mother, thinking that it would end my back bedroom woes. What it did, was make it worse. I found out that I didn't like it after painting just less than half of the room, and left it the way it was. I'm so horrible. I should join some sort of anonymous meeting over this.Proof that I quit painting the room less than halfway through lies in this pic. Along with a gaudy ass curtain. If you look to the top left of the window, you will see evidence of the smoke stained walls. I'm so glad I wasn't sniffing them, I'm sure I would have had enough nicotine intake to last me for 3 years!This is my last of the haunting pics. I swear, if they don't give you nightmares, you need to be seen. I'm sure that any shrink will tell you that you have an extreme desensitization to anything horrific. The double windows in his room, adorned with T-Bone's Philadelphia Eagles emblem that has been stuck to that window for over 14 years. Nice memorabilia, horrible water stains.

I couldn't take it a moment longer. I snagged T-Bone by the short hairs this morning, dragged him into this mess, and forced him to help me turn this dungeon into a bedroom. He obliged, but grudgingly. Did I mention he doesn't know how to paint? Yeah. Twenty-eight long years of his life, and he has never painted for more than 5 minutes. It's pathetic!

By this afternoon, life was looking grand. So grand, in fact, that I felt obligated to share the transformation with everyone! I know, I'm so thoughtful. Here's a slew of pics, nearly in the order that I presented them in the before section.

Drum roll please...So, what's all of this boil down to?
One gallon of Little Boy Blue Paint- $14.99
Spare curtains, Louvre doors, and an old laundry hammock- Free
Sweat, Fatigue, and Aching Muscles- Free
Proving to yourself that you aren't the redneck scumbag that the room portrayed you to be... PRICELESS!!

Very long post, after a very long and trying day. T-Bone's tired, I'm exhausted, and the room is done. I'm grateful. And, proud of myself for finally ridding that boil of a bedroom from my ~~ass~~ house!
P.s.- Did I forget to mention that we even painted the ceiling blue?? Yeah, we're nuts. That's why you like reading me!!

What These Say About Me

2008-03-04T05:31:00.000-08:00

Claire, over at Two Kids, a Gear-head and Me, did a tag that included the following rules:

The LOOK AT THIS STUFF! ISN'T IT NEAT? Tag

Find five things around your house (relatively) that say something about the person you are and snap a picture of them.

Tell us about them.

The pic that I posted first off says a bit about me, and isn't counting towards my 5 things. I just saw it on my computer and realized that it says quite a bit about me, and that it would fit here.
I'm a smart ass, I'm full of fun, and I hate to take things seriously. Oh, and I always sport the smug look, I'm not in Freud mode or I would try to break it down for all of you so you could better understand me. Let's just say that I'm not a snob, but I'm not the type of person that you are going to WANT to say hi to in the grocery store while in line if you don't know me. You're likely to be frightened off by the "touch me and die" look that I sport while in public.

Anyway, enough about my personality (which I'm actually tons of fun thank you very much) and on with the show!I'm. A. Geek. Nerd, brainiac, brown-noser, teacher's pet, anything of the sort.. that is who I am. I love to read. Love it so much, that I can NOT go to the bathroom without a book. Over the years, I have accumulated well over 200 books. What you see here, plus maybe 15 more, is all that I now have. Between moving, running, and leaving... all of my books have been scattered to the winds. The ones that I now have are the ones that I have managed to acquire again after the past 5 years. Not much, I know. I have a bigger habit of READING MY BOOKS 4 or 5 TIMES each. If I were a die hard about having a different (and new to me) book to read at different times, I would owe a truckload of debt. Books can be costly things, especially when they are Stephen King, John Grisham, or Nora Roberts. Also, I'm really not a book snob. If it is handed to me, I will read it. And it's rare that I don't finish a book because I didn't like it. Ok, the books are boring me... next!Truffle Whore. That's what this pic says about me. I don't mind chocolate, but I LOVE chocolate that has the word "truffle" on the label. As a matter of fact, my all time favorite candy.. I can't find this year... and this is the time of year that it is released! Ugh.. if anyone finds these bad boys anywhere, let me know. I will gladly wire you money via paypal so you can buy them and send them to me. I've searched everywhere.. so take a GOOD gander at these babies just in case you spot them...
WOW that's a big pic. I couldn't find the packaging, but they specifically say Dove Truffle on the package, and they are shaped like this. And, they only come 3 halves (if I remember right) per box. *sigh* I would die for these things, truly. Someone please find them and send me like 3 dozen!!! Anyway, back to the truffle whore thing. I didn't even pull out my whole truffle stash, as I just realized. I have some stashed in my dresser drawer for when I get in a fit during my sleeping hours. It must be Ambien induced.
Blurry pic, but you get a 3 for one right here. My computer, a Mountain Dew, and the cookbook I keep on my computer desk. Weird, huh? That's me though. I can NOT live without my computer. Can't. Or the Mountain Dew, for now. I plan to wean myself off it, at some point before summer hits. I've noticed that I make it through the heat with more ambition when I'm not slugging down Mountain Dew, and choose water instead. And the cookbook? That's my thing, baby. I cook. I like to try new food. I'm all over it.I'm a scent snob. Big time. I love to have candles burning in the house, but I will ONLY burn them if I am in the process of cleaning, then they will remain burning until they either go out on their own, I leave the house, or I go to bed. I love the Glade scent oil candles that you see in the purplish package. They melt down into an oil, and burn for hours. Plus, they give off the yummiest, and most vibrant scents that I have ever seen. Stacked in the basket with the Glade, are my breakaway tarts for my tart burner. In leather, sex on the beach, clean cotton, and vanilla musk. In the itty bitty basket, are little tart shots scented in Christmas Tree (pine) which gave the feel of a real Christmas this year since I won't allow a real tree. I'm the Grinch on that, and totally proud of it.Last, but not least, I'm a lover of all things dragon. I've lost a lot of my dragons over the years (much like my books) but I do have a small collection going again. This one just happened to be the one I chose for the pic. The others didn't catch the light right, and they looked blurrier than heck. What do dragons say about me? I think they show the side of my that loves to fantasize, about being a millionaire, writing a novel, winning the Nobel Prize.. ok, ok.. it says I'm a dreamer. And I can deal with that.
Sooo... I'm not tagging anyone. I know, don't you just hate that? But.. I'm not tagging anyone because if they need blog material, here it is. Run with it. Other than that, just enjoy what I posted, and consider yourself tagged if you have something of your own to say!

Menu Plan Monday 3/3-3/10

2008-03-03T05:59:00.000-08:00

So far, the crock pot recipes for last week are turning out to be duds. The slow cooker turkey sandwiches were okay, but they aren't something I can force myself to eat too often. The creamy red potatoes? They weren't done as much as I prefer them, making it hard to enjoy them. The sauce for the potatoes was okay, but not anything to do the cha cha slide over. We had the hearty beans with beef yesterday, which were okay. I had to add some cooked macaroni to it, it looked nothing more than beef with a smattering of beans. I don't recommend this recipe if you don't care for baked beans, because frankly... it's a baked bean casserole with beef. The end. :) T-Bone liked it, and has been a trooper so far, so I should consider myself blessed. This week, I'm heading back to old school and just throwing together a menu that won't be time consuming. Not that I have much going on this week, but I'm not so sure I want to spend time at the stove. Enough of my rambling, if you need more menu's, head on over and visit Laura@OrgJunkie and fill your week up!
Thursday- Supper Bakes (bought this a couple of week's ago and need to use it)
Friday- Spaghetti
Saturday- Kielbasa, Fried Potatoes
Sunday- Chili
Monday- Bruschetta Burgers, Fries
Tuesday- Quiche
Wednesday- Leftovers

Hoo-Ha Shenanigans

2008-02-28T20:23:00.000-08:00

Why is it that once you are reminded of something, you can't get rid of that moment no matter how hard you try? Even though you were blissfully unaware that THAT precise moment had ever existed, until someone brought it up again. This has happened to me. And it has opened up a whole venue of embarrassing moments for me lately, revolving around the object that I have thus far managed to dance around naming. I hate talking about it. Hate, hate, hate. BUT MAYBE... yes.. MAYBE.. if I share with everyone.. I will be able to get it OUT OF MY MIND before I go insane!
So, you ready to find out what I'm talking about? The one thing I covet above anything else, and rarely like to share? The one thing I take pride and joy in, and lavish a ton of attention on? Ok, I'm embellishing. A lot. Just trying to throw you off track.
I mean really.. who wants to talk about their female parts? Their va-jay-jay (Hallie speak), their hoo-ha, THEIR WOMANHOOD???
Well, I do. Of course. Because if I didn't... it wouldn't be here. So, kick back, relax, and enjoy my moments of HORROR, where the main character on the scene is my hoo-ha.
I had a horrible pregnancy with Buckwheat. Constant urinary tract infections that were uncontrollable, combined with kidney infections that knocked on my door at least monthly during those grueling nearly-9-months. To top it all off, that nasty little demon had his head shoved as far into my canal as he could get it, without breaking my water. Sometimes I swore that if I stood over a mirror, I would be able to see him peeking back at me.. HE WAS THAT LOW. And not just for a week, or two, or a month... but NEARLY 3 MONTHS. The most uncomfortable 3 months of pregnancy to begin with, were topped off with my son's head grinding into my nether regions. But anyway, I'm being sidetracked.
At some point late in my 8th month, I had an incident where I thought that my water broke. A quick trip to the hospital (I was unsure anyway, I had Braxton-Hicks contractions that didn't always go away with changing positions) assured me that it wasn't my water. My son was laying on my bladder so heavily, that I literally never felt the need to relieve myself, and couldn't control myself. Yeah, laugh it up. That still isn't the reason I'm posting this.
Within the next few days after the water that didn't break incident, I started noticing a weird discharge of fluids. And, to me, it had a slight odor to it. All I could think of was warm fresh bread (please don't let that ruin fresh bread for you.. except for you, and you over there, and you RIGHT THERE.. I don't mind if it ruins it for you guys). So, on my next OB visit, I pointed it out to my High Risk doc while he was doing an internal.
Now, let me point out that I didn't care for my doctor. Not one bit. I had a hard time understanding him, his English sucked that bad. He had no bedside manner, and even less humor. I couldn't talk to this guy about anything.
Before he could rattle off a list of things to do/not do over the next couple of weeks and then run out the door without answering my questions, I cornered him while he was finishing up the exam. And that is where I mortified myself for the rest of eternity.
T-Bone was there for every appointment I had, with it being his first child, he didn't want to miss a thing. Plus, the internals were always so uncomfortable and sometimes painful, that I used him to keep me calm. So, he was there when I mentioned it. And he was there to witness what happened next.
That doctor gave me a queer look, asked me what kind of "smell" I thought I was noticing, and after I explained that to me it smelled like warm bread... he did something awful. So awful, that I wiped it from my memory. Until T-Bone brought it up again a couple of weeks ago.. in front of friends.
Tired of waiting to see what happened??? Fine, I guess I should share.
That doctor leaned between my stirrup-ed legs, stopped mere centimeters from my hoo-ha (which, by the way.. was still uncovered)... and sniffed me. Long and hard. He took in a whole lungful of my femininity.
My mouth dropped. My heart stopped. He stood, exclaimed that everything smelled just fine to him, and walked away, pulling the curtain shut behind him. T-Bone actually had to start tugging on my arm to get me moving, so I could get dressed and leave the appointment. He must have noticed the look on my face, for he didn't say a word. Not then. Nope. My hubby's sweet like that.
The next appointment was set, instructions were given, I left the office. T-Bone and I were well in the truck and belted in before I broke the silence.
"No, he DID NOT just SNIFF ME!!" T-Bone couldn't control it any longer. He started laughing so hard that it took him a while to compose himself.
I understand what possessed the guy to do it, kind of. It wasn't like he was being a big old pervert, he was trying to get the gist of what I was smelling. And what better way to do that, than to go to the source. It was just so unexpected that it startled the hell out of me.
When I think about it though, if he had politely asked "Would you mind terribly if I sniffed your hoo-ha to get an accurate take on what you think you are smelling?"... I would have kicked the living shit out of him.. for as long as my legs could reach him. I would have been offended, I would have been shocked, I would have put up a fight. So, he just skipped all of that, and did what he thought he needed to do.
And that was embarrass me for life. Yup, that man needs a medal. And, if you need someone to sniff your hoo-ha for you, I have his number. I hope you are attracted to portly old guys with no humor, or it isn't going to go over well.

Getaway Recap

2008-02-27T11:18:00.000-08:00

We took off last weekend and made the just over 2 hour drive to Albany to visit our high school friend, Sara. We were originally supposed to head out nearly 2 weeks before we did, but a huge storm blew in and there was no way it was happening. Plus, to make it worse, the night before we were scheduled to leave for the second time, another storm blew in and had me chewing on my fingernails, waiting to see if it would clear up enough for us to leave in the morning.
Miraculously, all was clear Saturday morning and we prepared to leave.
Here's Buckwheat as we are preparing to leave, posing against the stack of shelving that will be used in his room once I get the bi-fold doors up, rug down, and new paint on the walls. Don't mind the monitor on the floor in my dining room, T-Bone has yet to take it out after it decided to stop working on his computer.Buckwheat and T-Bone posing, right before T-Bone hopped in the shower and dressed in real clothing, and not work threads. I have to remember not to take pics of him while wearing his EMT/Firefighter hat, it's reflective so that he can be seen in the dark while on a call.
We left at about 10:45 a.m., nearly 15 minutes behind schedule. On the way, I had to stop and head into a local grocery store to pick up some odds and ends that I either didn't have, or had forgotten. We hit lunch at McD's, and were on our way again.
Our second scheduled stop was at Brook's BBQ, the place rocks as I've mentioned before. We picked up 5 chicken halves to have with our dinner that night at Sara's. Fueled up, and headed out again.This was nearly an hour outside of our second stop, and around 15 minutes before T-Bone's first toll use encounter, which had him super nervous and wanting to pull his hair out. Did I forget to mention that T-Bone shaved in the car while I was in the grocery store? I think his pricey electric shaver that he had to have, has turned out to be a good investment after all!Buckwheat, at the same time, doing itsy bitsy spider. He usually doesn't play it without some extreme coaxing, so when I turned and saw him doing it on his own, I was impressed and managed to get a pic of it.
We had our harrowing turnpike experience, with T-Bone pissing other drivers off as he entered the wrong lane for the booths, then had to speed to catch the right exit right off it. Thankfully, these tolls were less than 15 minutes outside of Sara's home, so T-Bone had a bit of time to calm down before we pulled in the drive.
I didn't get any pics upon arrival, I think that getting settled in and reacquainted took most of my thought process, and I didn't manage to yank the camera out until all of us were in the kitchen, getting in the way, and helping/watching the dinner preparation.
T-Bone, in guest mode. He refuses to wear his hat in a kitchen, or near dinner time. Of course, he can't stand around chit chatting without his trusty sidekick, Old Man Dew. Those two are inseparable. The guy in the blue sweatshirt is Sara's hubby, Scott. And, on the right.. you can just barely see Sara at the counter.
Buckwheat, and Sara & Scott's little guy, Bug. They are both sitting in their big boy chairs for dinner time. The funny part about the big boy chairs? We brought ours up with us, and it turns out to be the exact same one that they have for Bug!Bug and Buckwheat, again. This time, Buckwheat is regaling us all with his prima ballerina pose. Yeah, he's a ham!T-Bone with the boys before dinner, giving them both antlers. Buckwheat calls it his big deer pose. He has millions!
Dinner was great, but Buckwheat was restless and really didn't eat like he should have. Bug, on the other hand, cleared his full plate, and asked for seconds!
After dinner, the boys played around while we all chatted. I have pics of them jumping on the bed that was made for us, pics of them playing, pics, pics, and more pics. But if I post them all at once, this post is going to be super long. So here are a few of my faves...
I was aiming for a pic of T-Bone as we were all chatting, and just as I aimed.. Sara scooted in for perfect timing! I LOVE this pic!Here's me and Sara. If I look kind of... agitated.. I was. A tad bit. We posed for this pic for at least 3 minutes before T-Bone actually got the camera to work. The look on my face is a tad pained, and for good reason. My eyes were burning from trying not to blink and ruin the pic, which would cause T-Bone to take another 3 minutes of posing to get another one! And, if you are thinking that Sara might belong to the clan of the short people, you would be wrong! She is actually maybe an inch or so shorter than I am. BUT.. I was wearing 3 inch heeled boots in this pic, and towered above her. I didn't realize it until after the pic was taken.I tried to do a one-handed-cam in front of face pic of me and T-Bone. It worked out all wrong, and I have the pic to prove it. But, to save my sanity with pic posting.. I will refrain from posting it. Yeah, that's the reason. Uhhh huh. Sure is. Sara took this pic for us, to save me another failure.Here's Sara, Scott, and Bug.. seeing us off on Sunday. We really did have a great time, and there was so much more to post about. But I'm wearing my lazy suit, and am so not in the mood to drag more pictures all over this blog. I told Sara that I would try to get them posted, and here they are!!

Giveaways Galore!

2008-02-26T11:05:00.000-08:00

Whew, what a day. Not just one contest going on that I am so digging, but two!!! Read that.. TWO!

Firstly, and only because I don't want to have to page hop around, head on over to Di's blog and enter into her

Oscars Schmoscars...Gimme a Book!!!CONTEST

The more you travel around her post, the more ways you will find to get entered. And hey, who doesn't want one of these??That's right. A suspense thriller. And I.WANT.IT. Then again, there isn't much that I don't want. But still! A shot at a free book, and I'm all over it. I love to read. That just proves I'm not your average PA woodchuck. *nods* Deadline is Feb. 29th. The best day in 4 years!

Then, dust off your oft used brain and head on over to Hallie's. You read that right. Hallie. As in... Wonderful World of Wieners. The one and only, baby. This up north bundle of firecrackers is hosting a contest of her own.. limericks+dachsies=more wieners than anyone knows what to do with.
You may submit one limerick to enter, if you like. BUT.. for those creative types out there who love to limerick it up.. go ahead and link to Hallie's wondiferous contest in a blog post of yours and feel free to jam up her comments section with as many limericks as you can come up with!
Oh.. almost forgot the prize that will drive all of you readers over there. Shame on me. For your time and creativity, the winner will receive a gift card to Pier 1 Imports! I so need one of those.. dun dun DUN!! And, what a coinkidink.. her contest ends on the 29th too.
Please tell me you still aren't here. Like.. go already. Get. Skedaddle. And contest it up!

Signs, Signs, Everywhere There's Signs

2008-02-26T08:26:00.001-08:00

Somehow, while commenting on Asthmagirl's blog yesterday (it was a post about a fish with signs extending off it) I ran off on a tangent and turned my comment totally into blog fodder for me, and left me apologizing for forgetting the real intention behind my comment to begin with. Don't you hate when that happens?
Anywho, my tangent included the massive amount of signs that I need posted around my home to instruct others as to locations of general commonly used items, where things go, and other common knowledge things. My children, and T-Bone on occasion, can't ever seem to remember what certain things are used for, where they go, or what they should do with them. So, I could totally use me some of the following signs.
No matter how big my garbage can is, I wind up with odds and ends that didn't make it in on the first shot from across the room, on my floor. Behind the can, next to it, or most popular, in front of it. And, what makes it even better, everyone in my house will walk by these wayward items, kicking them out of the way if they have to, just to get to their destination. Sometimes, I have seen the same person pass by the same piece of wrapper on the floor not once, or even twice, but upwards of eight times before I get tired of it being kicked and I pick it up. I always thought a garbage can was a pretty simple concept. Extend arm with trash in it, drop, pull arm back, walk away. Not around here though. Somehow, this concept has been turned into a scientific experiment to figure out if items dropped 3 feet away from said garbage can will miraculously hover and float their way into that can. So far, the results are pretty inconclusive. I will keep you updated.Every single time I ask one of my children to vacuum the floor, I'm always asked "Where is it?" Now, keep in mind that my vacuum isn't the world's tiniest version of this working wonder. Nope. It's a Bissell®. It's upright. And it's over 4 feet tall. No way can you miss this thing, and it isn't like I hide it under my bed. If they put forth a tiny bit of effort (and really, I mean tiny) they would find it in one of 3, possibly 4, locations. All of which are highly visible. In the dining room next to the cabinet, in the living room next to the big screen T.V. (surely, they can't miss it when it's sitting there since they watch so much of it.. can they? Yup.), in the computer room next to the fish tank, or in it's rightful place in the laundry room next to the bi-fold doors. I don't use my vacuum cleaner as a torturous form of the Easter Egg hunt. Really, I don't. I want my floors vacuumed, and I want it done by someone other than me. So, I certainly would not hide it.Above all the other signs that I want around my home, this one is absolutely needed. My poor floor has had so many urine drownings that I think it's debating as to whether it should rip up linoleum and head the hell out of dodge, just to regain some of its composure. The younger boys in my herd do not know how to aim. At all. I purposely stalk the bathroom when I know they are in it, so I can go in and rescue the floor as quickly as possible as soon as they exit. Just like the garbage can, I really didn't think that hitting the target was that hard to do. But, hang around one day when the boys are here and watch the river run through it after I.P. Freely (a.k.a. Toad or Stubby) leaves the bathroom. You would be amazed, and might possible start trying to come up with an invention that delivers urine to the correct place each and every time. I would invest in it.
These aren't the only things needed around my home. I need signs instructing where to leave dishes, where they can eat at, and where their jackets go. Along with the signs, I need full blown instruction manuals telling how to vacuum correctly, how to deliver scraped dishes to their correct locations, and how to keep the toys in the rooms they belong in. Extensive manuals. As in, step by step with pictures. In 20 languages, just in case.

Menu Plan Monday 2/28-3/6

2008-02-25T08:49:00.000-08:00

I'm so proud of myself for actually being on top of things this week! I'm pretty much trying a bunch of new things for this menu, I picked up a book of recipes called Taste of Home: Slow Cooker and it has a ton of recipes that I just can't wait to try. The best thing about this $5 book that I browsed through in the grocery aisle (and decided that I had to have it) is that it comes with 76 recipe cards that tear out easily, and are the perfect size!

If you are looking for more menus, head over to the Menu Plan Monday host site, Org Junkie. It's the best place to browse when you need some new ideas.

Thursday- Slow-Cooked Turkey Sandwiches*, Creamy Red Potatoes*
Friday- Out to dinner w/ runts (Chinese Buffet)
Saturday- Meatloaf, Homemade Mac 'n' Cheese, Carrots
Sunday- Hearty Beans with Beef*, Homemade Bread
Monday- Pizza Casserole*, Garlic Toast
Tuesday- Mix 'n' Match Omelette's, Toast
Wednesday- Leftovers
Slow-Cooked Turkey Sandwiches
6 c. cubed cooked turkey
2 c. cubed processed cheese (Velveeta)
1 can condensed Cream of Chicken Soup
1 can condensed Cream of Mushroom Soup
1/2 c. finely chopped onion
1/2 c. chopped celery
22 split sandwich buns, wheat is recommended
In a 3-qt. slow cooker, combine the first six ingredients. Cover and cook on low for 3-4 hours or until onion and celery are tender and cheese is melted. Stir before spooning onto buns.
Creamy Red Potatoes
7 c. cubed uncooked red potatoes
1 c. (8 ounces) cottage cheese
1/2 c. sour cream
1/2 c. cubed process cheese (Velveeta)
1 tablespoon dried minced onion
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 teaspoon salt
Paprika and minced chives, optional
Place the potatoes in a 3-qt. slow cooker. In a blender or food processor, puree cottage cheese and sour cream until smooth. Transfer to a bowl; stir in the processed cheese, onion, garlic and salt. Pour over potatoes and mix well.
Cover and cook on low for 5-6 hours or until potatoes are tender. Stir well before serving. Garnish with paprika and chives if desired.
Hearty Beans with Beef
1 pound ground beef
1 medium onion, chopped
1 can (16 ounces) baked beans, undrained
1 can (15-1/2 ounces) butter beans, rinsed and drained
1/2 c. ketchup
1/3 c. packed brown sugar
1 tablespoon barbecue sauce
1/4 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
In a large skillet, cook beef and onion over medium heat until meat is no longer pink; drain.
Transfer to a 5-qt. slow cooker. Stir in the remaining ingredients. Cover and cook on high for 3-4 hours or until heated through.
Pizza Casserole
3 pounds ground beef
1/2 c. chopped onion
1 jar (28 ounces) spaghetti sauce
2 jars (4-1/2 ounces each) sliced mushrooms, drained
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
Dash pepper
1 package (16 ounces) wide egg noodles, cooked and drained
2 packages (3-1/2 ounces each) sliced pepperoni
2 c. (8 ounces) shredded Cheddar Cheese
2 c. (8 ounces) shredded Mozzarella Cheese
Cook beef and onion over medium heat until meat is no longer pink; drain. Add spaghetti sauce, mushrooms, salt, garlic powder, oregano and pepper, heat through.
Spoon 4 cups into a 6-qt. slow cooker. Top with half of the noodles, pepperoni, and cheeses. Repeat layers. Cover and cook on high for 1 hour or until cheese is melted.***
***I think that I will be halving this recipe, and preparing it in a casserole dish and putting it in the oven. Or, if I decide to leave the recipe as a whole, I will prepare extras and freeze them. As is, it yields 12 servings.
And, for those who noticed that Thursday contains 2 recipes that need to be put in the crock pot, you win 1 nerd point. Unfortunately, I have just 1 crock pot. So, Wednesday will be used to make the Slow-cooked Turkey Sandwich filling, for I think it would be best served cold although it doesn't mention it in the book. If I test it on Wednesday and find that I prefer it warm, I have this wonderful invention called a microwave. It's a life saver.
Anyway, there you have it! I'm on time for once, and I can't wait to get crockin'! That kind of sounds... xxx'ish. You know what I meant. :)

Food... Glorious... Meme?

2008-02-23T04:37:00.000-08:00

I was tagged by Asthmagirl over at the Asthmagirl Cooks blog to do a food meme. On with the show!
Rules:
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.
2. Share 5 facts about yourself.
3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post and list their names (linking to them)
4. Let them know they've been tagged by leaving a comment at their blogs.

1. I love to cook, but I hate to do the dishes. And it irks me sometimes that I spend hours cooking, to enjoy the consumption for less than half an hour. I think that food should be a give and take relationship. Like, it took me 2 hours to cook it, so that food had better ante up with the 2 hours of delight that I should be getting from it.
2. My older sister refuses to try something new that I have made. Even if I have made it a ton of times, and everyone else loves it, she won't touch it if it deviates from her current food tastes. I made chocolate chip cookies for our cookie exchange at Christmas, and because I used vanilla pudding mix as an additive to keep them super soft, she refused to touch them. To my face anyway. When she thought I wasn't paying attention, she chowed down and found out the real joys of chocolate chip cookies done right!
3. My favorite food is lasagna, hands down. I will it eat every day, all day, and never tire of it. I currently use P-dub's Best Lasagna Ever recipe, and tweaked it a bit to my satisfaction. If you look in my freezer, you will see more than 3 trays of lasagna already cooked, and just waiting for the rest of my family to be ready to ingest lasagna, again.
4. I'm currently in love with a Cajun blend seasoning that I picked up as a replacement for crushed red pepper seasoning. Wal-Mart was completely out (yeah, wtf right?). This stuff has a sassy kick, and I've managed to use it in things just to liven it up. I think I used it on my eggs one day too, I'm totally becoming a seasoned Cajun whore.
5. I was in such a hurry to get the flock out of dodge, that I forgot to put a #5 in and had to fix it. Hmmm... there are certain things that I won't allow to touch on a plate. Just certain things, mind you. Like anything sweet cannot touch breads, meats, pastas.. well.. ANYTHING. My sweets need to remain untouched by anything else, and I won't eat another food if anything sweet has touched it. I refuse to try any meat that has anything sweet in it (like, pineapples (bleh), apples (bleh), apricots (bleh) you get the picture). I'm a meat snob, and refuse to have it girlied. Meat should be manly (and smothered in garlic).
Okay, enough about food 'cuz at this early hour it's making me hungry! Ahhh, five people that should be tagged about food. Kinda difficult, some people I know don't like to cook unless it's Stouffer's, so I'm going to point the finger at the following...
1. T-Bone (you saw that coming, right?) *He went to culinary school, let's find out how much time he spent in class while he was there, 'cuz I haven't seen much cookin' going on in my kitchen unless I'm doing it!
2. Sara *She's gotta have something up her sleeve!*
3. Shell *Just 'cuz I really wanna know her takes on food that she somehow manages to get her hubby to prepare.. I need tips!*
4. Tami *One good tag deserves another*
5. Ness *I chose her because I absolutely have to know what this woman does love food wise, when her pet peeve food dislikes aren't thrown into the mix*

Heading off to Sara's for the night, I can't believe I'm going to be able to spend more than 5 minutes with her! It's been over 12 years since I have seen her for more than just passing, and I'm tres excited. I promise to take lots of pics! T-Bone and I will be home tomorrow in time for the race, so I will try to upload them then.

And He Hated Me for Good Reason...

2008-02-22T12:07:00.001-08:00

Have you ever had something so monumentally horrific happen that you didn't think you would ever be able to face the light of day again? Something that made you want to curl into a fetal position, suck your thumb, and make weird mewing sounds for at least a month (bare minimum, depending on the severity.. it could have been for a year)? That's happened to me on at least.. oh.. rough estimate.. a gazillion times in my short 28 years of life. But one time that has been hanging out in my mind today was the one that banned me from Shell's house for an indeterminate timespan. It couldn't have been too awfully long, I think this incident occurred when I was 11 and she was 10, and by the time I was 12 we were hanging out together again.

Anywho, on with the story. Shell's dad held the most hatred for me ever after he left me and Shell alone in the house on one rainy day. Extreme boredom must have set in on that particular day. Something hung in the air that left a feeling of "something bad is coming this way" in my mouth from the moment that we bored with her massive collection of Barbie's®, their paraphernalia and all, which took up a good portion of her bedroom. The idea of dressing up was tossed aside as quickly as it was mentioned, it was a muggy day and constant changing just didn't meet the requirements for pre-pubescent sweat free fun.

We roamed upstairs for a bit, there was a nice little niche at the top of the stairs that contained only one room on the entire second floor of their quaint little abode. It was a great place for the gaming console revolution at that time. Shell owned a most coveted Nintendo®, something I could never fathom having in all of my childish dreams. And not only did she own the Nintendo®, she also had the gaming mat that went with it. Endless days of our younger years were spent in this room, running and jumping along to the modern technology of the late 80's, early 90's. Summer sweat would pour off us in gallons during vacation, and during the winter we would warm ourselves with that same type of sweat after a bitter cold walk home from school. Life was grand in that second floor room...

Until this particular day when Barbie®, with her perky plastic boobs and equally perky plastic booty, couldn't hold our interest for more than 5 minutes. I should have known that disaster lay ahead at that precise moment, Shell and I could Barbie® it up for hours on any given day. If Barbie® couldn't make me a happy child, you can bet your happy little ass that Nintendo® wasn't going to fill the bill either. Shell and I had an indescribable and unspoken itch that neither of us could lay a finger on. Until Shell suggested that we go treasure hunting in her attic. On the second floor. Next to the awesome little niche that held so many fond memories for me.

I was completely game. The two of us were always up for something new, and we had only been in her attic on maybe one occasion before this day. We imagined finding something so awesomely rad in that attic, that our afternoon would be filled with delight that was thus far unmatched in our young years.

Shell went first, walking steadily into the attic without a care in the world. She turned to the left, and out of my line of sight, so I readily followed behind her. I should have turned around and headed for home right that very minute. But, I lacked common sense at that age. Well, I still do, but that is besides the point. That day, I was a ball of curiosity that needed untangling.

I turned to the left, and started to head back towards the wall that was on the same end of the attic as the door that we had entered through. Shell was already at the wall, digging into boxes and moving things around without a care. She never even looked my way, so I figured that she was on a mission and I had better join her immediately so we could find an adventure on this rainy day.

Without missing a beat, I started towards Shell, weaving around boxes and clutter as I went. I was nearly close enough to touch her when the world beneath me seemed to disappear.

This is the point where I wish that I could tell you that Shell had found an ancient book, opened it, and transported us to a world of fantasy. Or, that I could tell you that somehow a black hole to nothingness opened up, a rip in time, and that I was sucked into it. Best yet, I wish that I could tell you it was a warp zone from Mario Brothers®, and that I was being summonsed to join the funky little spaghetti eating Italian plumbers to help them vanquish evil and rescue Princess Toadstool. I really, really, really wish I could tell you any of these. But, I cannot, and must plow ahead with the painful memory of what really happened on that day.

Just as quickly as the floor disappeared, something solid reappeared under me like lightning. There was nary a nanosecond between the two, just enough for me to realize that something had occurred. Oh yes, something indeed had occurred. Something that had me wanting to puke in fear the moment I realized what had happened.

The first thing I noticed, right off the bat, was that my hand was dangling into one of these...
Somehow, miraculously, magically, a sink had appeared in Shell's attic! But, wait, my leg was dangling into something too, at an oddly spread eagled disadvantage point. My eyes could not believe what they were seeing! My right leg was dangling into this while my left hand was fluttering into that above.My mind reached out in a million different directions all at once as it tried to piece together what was happening. It raced faster than it ever had as it tried to put this puzzle together, and in its heightened state of wtf-ness, nothing was coming together. As I tried to still my racing brain and bongo-drum-beating heart, I noticed that my tush was wet. And getting much wetter by the second. I swiveled my head down my body, and found my booty sitting in here while my leg dangled in this and my hand fluttered around in that.
My 11 year old ass was crack deep in tidy-bowl cleaner. Now, imagine if you will, the hand fluttering in the sink, the leg dangling in the tub, and the ass bathing in the toilet. And the bewildered look on my face that put the icing on the commode cake.I could hear Shell yelling from somewhere not too far away, but for the life of me I couldn't see her. Then, I could hear the furious pounding of feet on stairs. My first thought was that Shell was running off to leave me in the wonderful la la land of attic. As my brain started to slow down, I took stock of what was going on around me. And realized, with dawning horror, that I was in Shell's bathroom. It was her sink, her tub, her commode that my body was casually lounging in. But how on earth had it transported to the attic?? One final look around, and I was greeted with the following sight, and everything fell into place immediately.This hole right here depicts almost the same view I was looking up at almost 17 years ago. This was the black hole that transported me from the attic, and into Shell's bathroom. As she rushed up to the bathroom door, she was chanting "Oh no, Dad's gonna kill me. Oh no, Dad's gonna kill me. Oh no.. Da... Oh wow! Are you ok?" It took her a couple of seconds to register that not only was there a gaping hole leading from the attic to the basement, but that I may have injured myself during the very short trip.

I managed to disentangle my limbs from her bathroom facilities, and slowly stood, testing every muscle, joint, and bone to make sure that all was in working order. As we surveyed the damage, her father returns home and walks in to find me with a soaked ass, standing in his bathroom doorway, and gazing at the heavens.

You know how when someone is angry on the old cartoons, their face turns red and steam comes from their ears? This is the only time in my life that I have nearly seen it almost replicated for real. Being the church going man that her father was, he didn't curse at me like any other parent would have. But he ranted, and he raved, and he banished me from their house. And from Shell. And told me that I was a bad egg, and a bad influence. He sent me home crying, fearing my parents worse than I feared him, for he had vowed to call them and demand that they pay for the damage.

As far as I know, he didn't demand payment, and he had it fixed the next time I happened to be there (which, like I said, was in under a year but I can't remember just how long it was). The man never much cared for me all along, and that incident topped it all off. Even though I was allowed to hang with Shell again, his opinion of me never changed and he was very leery of allowing me in his home when he wasn't scrutinizing my every move.

I run into him from time to time, now that Shell and I are all grown up and have families of our own. Amazingly? This man strikes up a conversation with me every damned time, as if I have never fallen through his ceiling and cost him unexpected expenses. Maybe it's Alzheimer's, or Parkinsons', that is causing his memory lapse. Or, maybe I've changed and he has seen that I'm really a great person now.

On second thought, it must be Alzheimer's or Parkinsons', 'cuz I ain't changed one damned bit!!

Weird Things About Me Tag

2008-02-21T05:58:00.000-08:00

Tami lovingly tagged me for this meme, so I'm playing along just so I have blog material (I know, you must get tired of reading about nothing but Menu's!)

Once you are tagged, link back to the person who tagged you.Post these instructions on your blog.Post 7 random or weird facts about yourself on your blog (the weirder the better, if you ask me).Tag 7 people and link to them even if you think they won’t do it.Comment on their blog to let them know they have been tagged and hunt them down if you have to. These are the rules to follow, so I will be giving my facts and tagging some others. If you have already been tagged, oops, I guess I just want to know more facts about you.

7 weird things about me:

1. I'd rather puke in a sink than in a toilet. Yakking in a toilet makes me heave 10 times harder than I had originally intended to. Something about foreign pubes in the toilet (usually stuck in a spot where the cleaner of said toilet never sees it) just sets me off even more. And, if I have a pukey feeling but it just lingers, I can be guaranteed to get rid of it just by looking into a toilet bowl. Don't ask why I felt the need to talk about puke. Just read it.

2. I have the shortest attention span when it comes to projects. I will go into an idea headlong with a full steam, just to drop it the moment that it gets repetitive, mundane, or time consuming. I would love to scrapbook my photos, but I refuse to even put my photos in an album because the task starts looking like too much work when I think about it. You have to find the photos, then sort them, then put them in.. it's all a mind thing. Once I start thinking about what is involved in something, my mind shuts down and vetoes whatever I was thinking. I honestly think that I need some baby steps thinking programs to get me to finish 9/10 of the things around my home.

3. I have a hard time keeping my bedroom clean. If I were to take a picture of it and post it on my blog, I would lose a good chunk of my readers based on the picture alone. I like things to be clean, but I love for my bedroom to be the one room that I don't have to worry about keeping pretenses of clean. My clean clothing never makes it to my dresser, the dressers are cluttered, and I have an open closet (it has no doors) that seriously needs a good purging. Easter basket storage, important papers, stuff from T-Bone's mom & stepdad that were never thrown out.. it's awful. Now it's making me cringe!

4. I don't mind taking the kids somewhere fun to hang out so they can have a good time. But, if I'm not occupied in other adult interaction while we are there, the kids had better decide to have a ton of fun in less than half an hour, so I can leave. I don't like being somewhere with the kids and have to tag around behind them because I have nothing better to do. Case in point, Chuck E. Cheese the other day. The place was super crowded, we couldn't get a table because I refuse to order food there (hmm... pizza or IHop.. pizza or IHop.. yanno, the decision was so difficult) so I had to hold 3 jackets the entire time we were there. I was wearing a pair of new heeled boots, and standing there was killing me more than if I had ran a marathon. To top it all off, the amount of heat that was radiating off the bodies in that place was enough to have sweat pooling at the neck of my hoodie. I was tres uncomfortable, and I stuck it out for nearly 2 hours. But I made them book it out of there doing 90 mph, at the least.

5. When I'm pregnant, my body starts acting like my immune system is super purified and way too clean. What makes me think this? It could be the fact that I purposely drive fast on dirt roads to kick up dust (with the windows all of the way down) so I can inhale the flying dirt. Or, it could be that I get the strongest urge to take a container of baby powder and squeeze it lightly so I can inhale the little particles that poof up. Anything that gives off a slight dusting, I'm all over it. And for some reason, I get the strangest feeling of satisfaction after I inhale any of these things.

6. I will not drink milk, then smoke a cigarette. Or, drink milk, then eat certain foods afterwards. I get the sense that the milk curdles inside of me, and I can't do it. BUT.. I can't have a milkshake or chocolate milk without a cigarette. Yes, cigarettes.. they will kill me. But, it won't be from plain curdled milk!

7. If I deviate from my shower ritual, I feel like everything is all off. One slight change, and I'm feeling the need to end the shower, dry off, and start the showering process all over the right way. Makes it rough when T-Bone wants to "conserve" water and take a shower with me. I have to be super careful to have the basic procedure followed so I don't get out cringing.

Okay, enough weirdness. I'm sure that you now know more than you wanted to. But WAIT! There's more. I get to tag 7 people! Beware...

T-Bone, Shell, Sara, Leigh, Claireboe, Ness, and Wendy. Boy, that seems to be getting easier, or it's just that everyone hasn't done this one yet and tagged everyone I know! Have fun with it!

Menu Plan Monday (Belated)

2008-02-19T07:45:00.001-08:00

Look at that... only 1 day late this week! With last week running so late on my MPM, I was all sorts of discombobulated and forgot that yesterday was Monday. If you are looking for endless possibilities for you weekly menu, head over to menu planning land by clicking on the smiley guy!
Thursday- Angel Hair Pasta w/ Clam Sauce
Friday- Kielbasa Chowder (still haven't made it!)
Saturday- Away for the weekend
Sunday- Away for the weekend
Monday- Take-out (snagged on the way home)
Tuesday- Meatloaf, Homemade Mac 'n' Cheese, Carrots
Wednesday- Leftovers

T-Bone was no help this week, everything he mentioned.. I vetoed immediately. So maybe the problem was with me, and not him.. but I doubt that. Really do!

Twisted T-Bone

2008-02-15T15:14:00.000-08:00

My niece mentioned having to do a book report the other day, and asked for input on some good reading material. She is in 9th grade, so anything somewhat worth reading would have been suitable for a report.
But, when T-Bone's around, you know it ain't gonna be that easy. Here's T-Bone's idea of perfect book report fodder, and what it really means to him. Honestly, it got me thinking outside the box. Which fits, as you will see.

T-Bone seems to think that Dr. Seuss was a big time druggie. And, on a further note, he thinks that Dr. Seuss' Green Eggs and Ham is a prime example of this hippie's wanderings in psychedelic euphoria. His take on the book is as follows...

I am Sam
I am Sam
Sam I am

Meet Sam. A.K.A., the big drug pusher. Sam's goal in Whoville? To wreak havoc upon little Who's with his drugs of choice, Green Eggs and Ham. In this harmless childrens' book, T-Bone finds the real inner soul to the entire ponderings found within. And Sam I Am is peer pressure, offering his Green Eggs and Ham to any willing soul that will take it. He even tries to entice them, by making some huge offerings along the way.

When it comes to Sam I Am, he will offer you any avenue imaginable that will grease the wheels of your imagination, and entice you into trying his drugs. His Green Eggs and Ham always look better when he offers them in the following ways.

Would you like them
here or there?
Would you like them
in a house?
Would you like them
with a mouse?
Would you eat them
in a box?
Would you eat them
with a fox?
Would you? Could you?
In a car?
Eat them! Eat them!
Here they are.
You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them
in a tree!
A train! A train!
A train! A train!
Could you, would you,
on a train?
Not on a train! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! Sam! Let me be!
Say!
In the dark?
Here in the dark!
Would you, could you, in the dark?
Would you, could you, in the rain?
Could you, would you,
with a goat?
Would you, could you,
on a boat?

See where T-Bone is coming from? There are only so many things that a poor Who can resist. And here, Sam I Am nearly offers the world.

He chooses one poor soul in particular for this rendition of his drug pushing. Of course, being that this book is really about drug use (in T-Bone's mind), the pushee is nameless to protect his identity.

And, in the beginning, this little guy really hates Sam I Am.

That Sam-I-am!
That Sam-I-am!
I do not like
that Sam-I-am!

Now, to give this little guy credit, he does one hellacious job of refusing Sam I Am all through the ordeal.
He repeatedly refuses Sam I Am's offers on a platter, as you can see.

I could not, would not, on a boat.
I will not, will not, with a goat.
I will not eat them in the rain.
I will not eat them on a train.
Not in the dark! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! You let me be!
I do not like them in a box.
I do not like them with a fox.
I will not eat them in a house.
I do not like them with a mouse.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them ANYWHERE!

I do not like
green eggs
and ham!

I do not like them,
Sam-I-am.

He puts up quite a fight, through nearly the whole story. But the drug pushing Sam I Am keeps chipping away at poor unnamed's resolve until he finally breaks. And break he does...

Sam!
If you will let me be,
I will try them.
You will see.

And this is where Sam I Am ropes in another one...

Say!
I like green eggs and ham!
I do! I like them, Sam-I-am!
And I would eat them in a boat.
And I would eat them with a goat...

And I will eat them in the rain.
And in the dark. And on a train.
And in a car. And in a tree.
They are so good, so good, you see!

So I will eat them in a box.
And I will eat them with a fox.
And I will eat them in a house.
And I will eat them with a mouse.
And I will eat them here and there.
Say! I will eat them ANYWHERE!

I do so like
green eggs and ham!
Thank you!
Thank you,
Sam-I-am!

Another soul lost to the whacked out world of drugs. Peer pressure is hard to overcome, and poor unnamed couldn't fight it off any longer. He was sucked under by the illustrious Sam I Am.

Mind you, this is just T-Bone's take on Green Eggs and Ham. It really doesn't mean that the story is really about drug pushing. What it does mean, is that T-Bone has too much time on his hands. And that he needs to get a different hobby, and leave that poor cheeba puffin' Dr. Seuss alone.

Menu Plan WhatDay?

2008-02-14T07:18:00.001-08:00

Yes, I realize that it is not Monday. And that I have been seriously lazy this week. BUT... Today is the day that I normally go shopping, so my week of menu planning hasn't been completely wrecked.. yet. Here's my menu for the next week!
Thursday- Fish Sticks, Ranch Bacon Salad
Friday- Pizza
Saturday- Spaghetti w/ Meatballs
Sunday- TBA (Race at sister's, tentative)
Monday- Pancakes, Eggs, Sausage
Tuesday- Kielbasa Chowder
Wednesday- Leftovers

Food just doesn't even sound good to me for the past week. I think I might still have a touch of the stomach bug from the week before (or maybe it's another bout of it, bleh), so food and I are not the best of friends as of yet.
If you are looking for more ideas for menu plans, head over to the land of menu plans by clicking on the smiley dude with the forks at the top of this post!

Convo One Liners

2008-02-11T16:49:00.000-08:00

Conversation I had with T-Bone while heading out to do some shopping today, stemming from the usual "I love you more... No, I love you more" ordeal...
T-Bone:
"Honey, I have loved you in my past, love you in the present, and will love you in the future. I love you with my id, my ego, my everything. So, how does that make you feel?"

Me:
"Used."

Or, the one we had the other day getting into the car as it was still warming up...Sung to the tune of the Food..Glorious..Food song from Ice Age 2.
Me:
"Heat....glorious.. heat!!! I'm anxious to try it!"
T-Bone:
"300 degrees...."
Me:
"Our favorite climate!"

Number 1, you have to have seen the movie and recognize the song to know what I'm talking about. Number 2, I came back at T-Bone so quick with my last response.. that he couldn't stop laughing for a good 2 minutes!
I kill me sometimes.

Lonely Is As Lonely Does

2008-02-10T08:58:00.000-08:00

I have pondered over the following dilemma for quite some time. Pondered over it so much, that I actually wrote an article about it. Yes, you can get to that article by clicking on the highlighted word right there. Impressive, right?

Anyway, my dilemma, if you didn't bother reading that article, is having absolutely ZERO friends to hang out with. None, zip, zilch. NADA. And it drives me nuts! I love to socialize, I love to entertain, I love to have adult interaction, dammit!

It actually feels more like pulling teeth when trying to get people to stop over to visit. This shouldn't be a difficult task. We aren't the "odd couple" that everyone tries to avoid (at least, I don't think we are) because we might try to force you to eat some sort of animal appendage that should never be thought of as food. We aren't bitchy, or moody, or crass. We aren't judgmental, or overly opinionated.

Our house is most generally clean enough for company, even if it's someone who isn't family. Yes, I feel there are two levels of clean.. family clean, and upscale clean. Most times, my house lingers between the two, so as not to offend guests that drop by out of the blue.

But my poor house stands on its own level of clean for no good reason. I should just trash the damned place, leave dirty dishes lying around with 3 months worth of mold accumulating on them. Dirty laundry on the floor, soda cans littering every free space, soiled diapers spilling out of the trash and onto the floor. Really, it wouldn't matter if I did this.. because NO ONE EVER DROPS BY!

Nine times out of 10, I will invite someone up for dinner, games, movies, social interaction.. and they deliver the lamest excuses about why not to drop by. Or just flat out lie, saying that they have other arrangements and can't make it.

Don't get me wrong, it isn't that we don't have friends, as I stated earlier. I was exaggerating a bit. We DO have friends, and the loyal ones just happen to live far enough away that a drive out to our house for them is completely out of the way. We socialize on a pretty regular basis with 3 couples. Each of them happen to live fairly close to towns/cities that we drive to/through on a regular occasion.. so going to their homes isn't a big deal. But T-Bone and I like to entertain at home every now and then, in our own comfort zone. And it happens practically never.

On very, very, VERY rare occasions, my cousin and her hubby will come up for a round of game night. But it always seems hurried, one or the other of the two always has to work the next day. And, it never fails, that they seem more offended at the mention of appetizers than anything. Who wants to do a game night without freakin' appetizers?? Not moi! Plus, my cousin and her man don't have children. So that makes it tres awkward. We usually schedule game night around Buckwheat's bedtime, so that he isn't stepping on toes. Intermittently, we will head out with these two and go bowling, or just go for dinner and some shopping, but I don't honestly feel like we connect with these guys.

Of course, the ones I do connect with are the 3 couples that never drop by because of location. Location, location, location. *sigh* I think we are doomed.

I think that what makes it worse is the fact that our families never come up to visit. NEVER! My mother hasn't been here in so long that I really wonder if she even knows how to get here. His family drops by rarely, they all have super busy schedules and I'm sure that we are the last things on their minds after a long day of work, shopping, and bar hopping (did I just type that out loud?), along with overly sports active children who are involved in way too many leagues at once.

Anyway, enough of my rant. I would just love to run into a couple who doesn't mind having a 50/50 friendship. I don't mind going out of my way, as long as the same is reciprocated. We do have 1 male friend that we both worked with a year ago, who drops by whenever I e-mail him. He's single, he works too much, but he goes out of his way to drop by if I ask him to. Actually, he dropped down a couple weeks ago and had appetizers and dessert while we played some games, then we all kicked back and watched Number 23. I enjoyed it, and I'm glad that he dropped by. But.. he's single. There wasn't a female for me to relate to, although I get along great with him.

Are we the only couple who have this problem? We need interaction before we fall into a serious slump! Oh, and Sarasponda, if you are reading this.. we need to pick a date for T-Bone and I to make the nearly 4 hour haul up to visit with you. I'll make an exception for you, you don't drive. :)

How Others See You

2008-02-09T07:59:00.000-08:00

I've wondered for nearly all of my life just how others around me see me. Do they think I'm funny, witty, useful, gullible, retarded, or spectacular? The way that some people act around me makes me wonder if they think I'm a floor mat that is sitting there for the only necessity of them wiping the crap off their shoes.

Speaking of wiping, and crap, it brings me around to the actual reason for this post. See, how others view me, along with wiping and crap, tie into one enormously embarrassing moment for me that I so cannot understand, even years later, how it came about, and how I wound up in the midst of it.

It had to have been almost 2 years ago exactly that this incident worth mentioning happened. Buckwheat was maybe a year old, so yeah.. 2 years ago sounds good. Living in NY state at the time, I was returning the soda bottles that I had collected under my sink, in my pantry, under the seats in my car, off my computer stand, on my headboard to my bed.. you get the picture.. at a local grocery store. They have those machines that you feed your returnables into, it crushes, tallies, and prints out a receipt when you are done, all for your convenience. Well, here I was with Buckwheat in the front of the cart, while I fed those cans and bottles (all Mountain Dew related) into those forsaken machines that would break down every 3 or 4 cans so that it made returning them lousier than having to wade through the plastic and aluminum that was knee high around your house because you were avoiding those machines specifically. At some point, I saw an elderly lady scoot around the corner to use the employees only restroom that was across from the return machines.

I thought nothing of it, the elderly have a hard time controlling their bodies, and if she had to go, then I wasn't going to hold it against her for using an employees only restroom. I was just finishing up with my cans and bottles when I heard someone sniffling from the doorway of said restroom.

I looked around, and there stood the lady that had glided in a bit before. She was flapping her hands in mid-air, while crying copious tears. Instantly, I was worried that there was something terribly wrong with her, health wise, and asked if she needed some help. My first mistake.. right there.

She sniffled loudly, moaned about how this just can't be happening, and asked me to follow her into the restroom. My brain must have had reasoning turned off at that point, because I made sure that Buckwheat was secured in the cart, and pulled him closer to the employees only restroom.

As I entered the room, my nose was assaulted with the vicious aroma of feces. I held my breath the best that I could, as I asked the lady if she was okay, yet again.

She started crying harder, and I was getting ready to bolt for the nearest phone to call 911 with. Then, through her tears and sniffles, she manages to tell me the following...

That she had been sick, and just HAD to go to the bathroom, but somehow she missed the toilet, and it wound up going up her back, down her legs, and nearly all over her clothing. At this point, I could do nothing more than stand there as she told me how she managed to get it off the toilet, and she thinks she got it off her legs... but that she was pretty sure her backside was still covered in it and that there was no way she could continue her daily errands without being cleaned up because it would get all over her slacks and then everyone would know.

And then she asked me to see if I could help her clean up her backside. Now, living in a small NY town, I somewhat knew this lady. SOMEWHAT. And here she was asking me to clean her shitty ass as if she were a 2 year old. I didn't know what to say.. my mind churned with a million reasons why I shouldn't be doing it, and a million reasons why I should just leave, but one look at her heart broken face and none of it would come forth and spew out of my mouth so I could deliver the excuse.

I sighed, steeled myself, and grabbed the wipes out of my son's diaper bag that was sitting under the cart. With all of the willpower that I had ever had, I assisted this old lady in cleaning her backside of feces. I held my breath, choked down vomit, and worried about the days when my ass was going to look like that, and tried to veer away from any conversation with this lady.

It took less than 2 minutes to clean her, and assure her that she was fine. She rambled on the entire time I was cleaning her about how embarrassing this was for her. Lady, she had no clue. My 26 year old body was cleaning its first old person hiney. I purposely never went into being a CNA for this reason specifically. I couldn't bring myself to face the nether regions of an older person. And here I was, doing just that, and not getting paid for it.

I went home that day mortified, in a daze, wondering if I had really just cleaned an old lady's ass at the grocery store. Each time the thought would pop up in detail, I would gag down the vomit that threatened to rise, and remind myself that good things come to those who help others in need. That what goes around, comes around.

So, please.. if.. in 50 years or so.. you are confronted in a grocery store with a little old lady moaning about shitting herself and needing help.. do us all a favor.. shoot me and put me out of my misery. I don't think I could live with myself for causing someone else the emotional damage that it did to me.

Tying in to what other people think of me.. did I have the kind of look on my face that day in the grocery store that gave this lady the impression that I liked to wipe shitty asses that I wasn't familiar with? It haunts me, even to this day, that I might be the type of person that when others look at me, they see me wiping their asses in the future.

I think I need to go out and make a new name for myself. I need to rectify what I've started, I need to stand up for what I believe in, I need to assert myself! Then again.. I'm just not that mean. I think that I will forever be an ass wiper.

So... what do you think others see when they look at you??

Menu Plan Monday 1/31-2/7

2008-02-04T15:59:00.000-08:00

If tasty recipes snag you every time, or you just can't stand the thought of having the same old crap for even more day, then click the smiley dude to head on over to a world filled with weekly menus.

Thursday- Steak-ums & French Fries
Friday- Pizza
Saturday- Pork Roast, Homemade Mac N Cheese, Carrots
Sunday- Kielbasa Chowder
Monday- Pancakes, Eggs, Sausage
Tuesday- BLT's, Ranch Bacon Salad
Wednesday- Leftover's

Enjoy your week!

I Just Gotta Say...

2008-02-03T19:18:00.001-08:00

GO GIANTS!!! Absolutely outrageous game. I was pulling for the Giants (although I hate football) and they pulled it off. They STOMPED ASS! Go NY!

Mixed Nuts 1/24-2/2

2008-02-02T17:57:00.000-08:00

It's been a long week, and then some. T-Bone is putting in some massive overtime (80 hours in one payweek, 92 in one week total) and I am getting so effin' bored that I think I'm going to start counting flowers on the wall. I have lost all ambition that I ever thought of possessing, so I haven't wanted to do anything. I have been dragging my dead ass to the computer long enough lately to get bored within 5 minutes. And as a self-professed internet junkie, that is a very bad thing.

I keep trying to talk myself down, berating myself for being such a lazy sack of you know what, and it isn't working. Thank goodness that at least my dishes really haven't piled up on me yet, and that I might be able to crawl out of my funk before they do.

On top of the lazy berating I've been doing, I've also been belittling the type of wife that I have been to T-Bone. I hate myself for allowing him to come home to a house that isn't spotless, while he is usually greeted by the sight of me lounging on the couch staring off into space. Maybe now that I have it all out, I will be able to pull myself back just enough to get the house into a spotless semblance of something that I won't be disgusted to look at. Really, it doesn't take much to disgust me, and I think I'm 2 levels below that point. Que sera sera, life is giving me lemons and I'm adding to the lemonade I'm making by crying into it.

I'm stronger than this, and I know it. I have no reason to be in this state, and come what may I will crawl out of it soon enough. Bare with me long enough, and you might possibly be able to forgive my horrifically depressing posts.

Enough of the crying over the non-spilt milk.. onto my mixed nuts!

~*~ At some point last week, T-Bone and I were driving home quite late on a back road to our house. Upon cresting a small knoll that rounds a slight bend in the road, we were faced with a deer in the road. Albeit, a dead deer, but STILL a deer. T-Bone locked up the brakes and braced for impact, which was the smartest move he could have made on the very narrow stretch of road that we were on. We didn't stop in time. Our car bumped and thumped its way over the deer. We were slowed to nearly nothing, but still moving. And as we stared at each other in horror, we heard the unmistakable sound of something dragging along the road as we were coasting. Something rather large being dragged along the road. That dead deer had the audacity, nay... the unmitigated gore... to lodge itself under our car, and allow it's barely rotting carcass a joy ride via our undercarriage. My mouth dropped onto my chest, and my hands started flapping wildly at T-Bone. "Stop the car! Stop, stop, STOP!! Get out and dislodge that thing! That is gross!" T-Bone looked at me in a mildly stupid manor, stopped the car, and moved the shifting lever into what I thought was Park. Nope. He did the manliest thing he could think of. He jammed the car into reverse, backed up a tad, threw it into drive, and punched the gas. I swallowed the reverse vomit that was gathering in my throat as we yet again thumped and bumped our way over that dead deer for the second time in less than thirty seconds. I stared at him as he drove in silence for at least 10 seconds, before offering a lame excuse about not being able to stop in time. Yeah, okay. That wasn't my problem. He should have pulled the carcass out from under the car by hand, instead of trouncing all over it again. He looked at me long and hard, between glancing at the road. And a typical T-Bone remark came from him. "Yeah, I could have. But tell me that wasn't the funniest thing ever." I must admit, we laughed a good one over the next 2 miles home.

~*~ We watched a few different movies over the past couple of weeks. I recommend them all (I wouldn't have watched them if I didn't think they were worth it) and urge you to view them at your leisure. Shaun of the Dead and Undertaking Betty made for a great Brit flick weekend. Both were pretty hilarious (although Shaun of the Dead was a tad bloody) and even made T-Bone laugh out loud. Although, he gets into a roaring fit of laughter over Disney Animations. We also watched Scary Movie 4, Van Helsing, and Number 23. Loved them, loved them. loved them!

~*~ Buckwheat chose to go to Pizza Hut today for lunch while we were out shopping. I'm not a big fan of the place, but he chose something other than the dreaded McD's, so I went without throwing a fit. As we were walking across the parking lot towards the entrance, T-Bone thought that Buckwheat would enjoy it if we swooped him into the air while holding his hands. T-Bone asked if I was holding tight, so I checked my grip and affirmed that systems were a go. On 3, we swung him lightly forward. T-Bone didn't do his own systems check, and his grip on Buckwheat was less than up to snuff. As Buckwheat floated delicately through the air on the upswing, T-Bone's grip slipped and he lost the little guy's hand. He gracefully returned to the earth in a small heap, so I scooped him up quickly and righted him. T-Bone was mortified, Buckwheat was bewildered, and I was laughing so hard that the urge to pee was very threatening. Thankfully, we weren't swinging him at more than our knee height, so it wasn't a fall that did more than let him know that he met pavement. As we walked in the door, T-Bone verbally envisioned the hostess greeting us with "Hey, aren't you the bad parents that just threw your kid onto the ground? We have a special table for people like you." And we are rightfully seated in the huge trash bin outside the door. He tends to have an overactive imagination at any given time.

~*~ Speaking of Pizza Hut, T-Bone was really vying for the Worst Father of the Year Award. As we were having a salad, Buckwheat saw Poppa eating an onion and asked for a bite. So T-Bone obliged. The little guy hung on long enough for the onion to bite him back three times as hard as he had chomped into it, before trying to scrape his tongue out of his mouth with his fingers. T-Bone sat there in horror while Buckwheat gagged with tears streaming down his face, and a big runner of drool extended nearly to the table from his lip, before jumping in to save the day. His only reasoning for offering the little guy the onion was "Well, he wanted it! And damn, those things are full of bite!"

~*~ On our way home from our shopping expedition today, we entered into a very small village that is known for State Troopers hanging out waiting to catch speeders. T-Bone adjusted his speed, although he was still nearly 7 mph over the speed limit. As we cruised into the busiest part of the town (it has a gas station right there, its only claim to fame), we spotted one of those go-getting Staties sitting around the bend. We breezed by, and I checked my rear view, letting out a slight sigh as we started to come up on the only Stop sign in the town. Out of instinct, I looked again, and what should I see? A big ole' Statie looking back at me. He was right behind us. I looked at T-Bone, and said "That's it. You've done it now. He's coming for you!" He giggled nervously, admitted that it was possible, and headed through the Stop sign after checking for traffic. We had just pulled through when we heard the unmistakable blip of the sirens, and our windows were awash in beautiful red and blues. He was pulling us over. I turned to T-Bone and asked if he was happy that he just had to go speeding through that section. He shifted uncomfortably, pulled out his wallet, and had me get the registration out of the glove box. (FYI- Your glove box never looks worse than when you are frantically searching for something in it that someone else wants post haste). The Statie sauntered up to the car, and T-Bone looked around nervously. The Trooper stood there for nearly 5 seconds before my oblivious hubby realized that the window was still up. Yeah, he gets pulled over so frequently that he doesn't know the drill. He puts the window down, and feigns ignorance when the young Trooper asked if he knew why he was being pulled over. And thank the powers that be that he didn't blurt out how he was going 7 mph over the posted speed limit. This young man just wanted to let us know that our brake light was out on the rear passenger side, and to give us a warning to get it fixed. Thanks goodness that the plates, registration, inspection, insurance, and licenses were all good to go. He ran it all, the good little doobie that he was.

~*~ After our humiliating stint on the side of the road while waiting for the Statie to make sure everything was clear, the Trooper hopped back into his big bad SUV as we started to pull out. Buckwheat was in the back seat, looking behind us. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, he squealed "Run Poppa RUN!!!" T-Bone started laughing like a mad man, as Buckwheat repeated his chant in the back seat. I had to wonder where on earth that came from inside his little mind. Right before the Trooper pulled off to head back to his waiting spot, I noticed that Buckwheat was frantically trying to escape his child harness and stand in his seat. I turned around, and with the voice of Satan I threatened my little guy. "You see that bad copper back there? If you don't sit down RIGHT NOW, he's going to come and take you away forever!!" It worked, he sat down and frantically tried to readjust his harness with more vigor than he was trying to get out of it. Cruel, yes. Effective? Even better, and rules out the cruelness.

I have more, but I think I'm turning in early tonight. Enjoy!

Random Stuffs

2008-01-31T00:01:00.000-08:00

Firstly, 'cuz it's most important, I've finally been chosen for the Excellent Blogger Award by Tami @ One Scrappy Chicklet. Thanks so much for realizing my blogging potential, even if I haven't had the ambition to blog in a few days! In blogging tradition, I will TRY to nominate another 10 people for this award who don't already have it, but I think I may be stretching that a tad since nearly everyone I visit has it already.
1) T-Bone, you guys knew this would be choice #1 right? 'Cuz he's my better half. He's the chow in my der. He's the spagh in my etti. And he's just plain funny. Really, I'm not saying this because he is standing behind me with a poker to my back. Nope not me. He really deserves it. And he better quit slacking even more than I do on posting.
2) Sara at Sarandipity. She was the first blog that I ever read, and is the reason that I started blogging myself. Oh, and she's been there for me since we were like, knee high to a grasshopper. Which for her, wasn't all that long ago at her short stature. She's quirky, she's smart, and she likes to roleplay. How cool can one chick be?
3) Shell is the author of C Shell somethin' somethin' seashore slash kids. Lol, it's quite the title that ties up my tongue each time, and I purposely posted it wrong. She's on a mission to coax her hubby into 5 little munchkins running around, and somehow she has managed to talk him into lucky #4 that she is now sporting around.
4) Wendy hails from Life in the Button Factory. She found me through some menu planning at another site, and I have found that we have a few things in common. Like, we are determined to set out on desserts that we know will be a complete fiasco, but we forge on anyway.
5) KellyJean @ Laughing Always Helps is being chosen, although I swear she has been nominated by another blogger, but I can't seem to find a post about it on her site. She's a sweetheart of a lady, who is toughing it out through some serious times. Hop on over and give this lady some much needed love!
Am I done yet? I gotta be close, right? What?? Only half way? What the hell...
6) My Wooden Spoon, A Cowboy's Wife, and Blogging with Cents author Lori is one heck of a busy woman! And she's always giving stuff away, so why shouldn't she be nominated? Let's never mind that she has one of those uber coolerific Blogger's Choice Awards for Best Food Blog, everyone can use another award!
7) ClaireBoe is a fun spirited lady with loads on her hands between homeschooling The Prince and The Princess, while taking care of The Gear Head. Another site that I thought was chosen for the award, yet I can't find it on their blog!
8) The Baroness is one oddly funny lady. She refers to herself in the third person, and also considers herself an assistant to herself. Don't stand there looking all confused, go check her out.
9) Eternal Flux is a heart warming, thoughtful blog that I just stared at for 10 minutes trying to remember the poor lady's name that is the author of it. Please don't lynch me, I swear I think I knew it at one point and now I feel like an ass. But I really do go there!
10) Yanno what? I just don't have it in me. I ain't got 10. Slay me now, it means that I need to travel in my own circle of blog goodness in order to gain new friends!

Just an FYI, I found where KellyJean was nominated, but I ain't changing it dang it! I got 9 out of 10, and I didn't have to tell you that I knew she was chosen previously. I could have acted clueless. Not that I don't most of the time anyway.

I was tagged with a Meme, so I should get that out of the way. Thanks to the ever thoughtful Asthmagirl for pointing the finger in my direction. Here's what's going down...

(1) Link to the person that tagged you.
(2) Post the rules on your blog.
(3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
(4) Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
(5) Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.

Let's get cracking shall we?

O-N-E) I refuse to make my bed, because I'm just going to use it again. BUT I won't use it again until the sheets are tucked in nicely, and the blankets tossed back onto the bed in such a manner. I should just give up and start making the bed and spare those precious few moments before falling into bed doing something else.

T-W-O) I can barely get the energy up during the winter to shave my legs. Once summer hits, I become a shaving freak. EVERY day, sometimes twice a day, and they have to be lotioned. Sometimes I feel bad that my husband doesn't get the best of my legs during the winter, but he doesn't complain about it. Maybe he should, then he wouldn't have to deal with it.

T-H-R-E-E) I won't take a shower without brushing my hair while I'm in there. With a ton of conditioner in it. My hair is so thick that I can't get a brush through it at any other time. I frequently have hair hissy fits.

F-O-U-R) I frequently reminisce about where the scars on my body came from. Like the ones on the backs of my hands that are a mix of IV misses, IV hits, and little sister dig marks. From nearly 20 years ago. She was vicious. Or the ones on my arm from a nasty little fat albino kid in 6th grade who thought that very long, dracula-looking nails were hip in the guy scene, and used them to flay my arm wide open. Serious infection with that one. When his father was brought into the picture over the incident, he swore that the blood letting was the beginning to a long happy future between us. I can't remember if I puked on the guy's shoes or not, I should have if I didn't.

F-I-V-E) I wish that I could go back and change my teenage years. I would love to finish school (What? Moi? Didn't get a diploma? Damned skippy, and I can verbally dance with the rest of y'all, so there!) Sorry, where was I? Yes, I would love to go back and finish, there are days that I mourn the loss of so much of my younger days that I didn't get to live because I chose another path.

S-I-X) I constantly scope out other female bodies. Yup, I'm admitting that. I mentally critique them, taking note of areas that I would love to have look like that.. areas that had BETTER never look like THAT, and so forth. I don't do it because I crave the female body, I do it so that I know what I'm up against. Yup, I'm vain. Sue me.

Now, I'm tagging T-Bone, Sara, Shell, Tami, Wendy, and ClaireBoe. Whew, I think I'm going to close this post for now, and tag everyone later along with leaving little comments to let people know they should swing by for award pick up. I'm whooped, and it's early.

Menu Plan Monday 1/31-2/7

2008-01-28T10:21:00.000-08:00

My husband actually had the nerve to ask me last week why I make my menu's on Monday, when it doesn't actually start until Thursday's. His small form of mutiny by asking that had me keeping my temper in check as I calmly replied "T-Bone, it gives me time for a few things by doing it this way. 1) I'm not running around Thursday morning trying to figure out what to have for the week, 2) I'm not scrambling like a mad woman on Thursday morning while trying to get a grocery list together, and 3) It gives me a small feeling of accomplishment by knowing that some small part of my life is organized." He humbly said that he just thought he would ask, since I don't go shopping until Thursday. I showed him, now didn't I? With that said, here's my menu for NEXT week (from Thursday to Wednesday).

Thursday- Meatball Soup
Friday- Pizza & Wings
Saturday- Pot Roast w/ Veggies, Homemade Mac N' Cheese
Sunday- Goulash, Appetizers
Monday- Marlboro Man's Favorite Sandwich, French Fries
Tuesday- Breakfast Burritos (Aiming for McSkillet Burrito style from McD's), Toast
Wednesday- Leftovers

Not really sure which appetizers I will be using, but I'm almost positive that this one will be the star. I don't even know if anyone is coming! Yikes. Either way, check these bad boys out. I can eat a whole pan, alone. They are THAT good! Enjoy your week, and if you are looking for more menu ideas, click on the smiley fork guy at the top of this post and head on over to a land of menu planning!

My First Blog Award!

2008-01-28T06:28:00.001-08:00

I'm so very excited to have temporarily won this award! Why temporarily, do you ask? Because, the giver of this award has been inspired by my comment that awarded this wondiferous image to hold a small competition, looking to see if someone can one up me. Think you have the guts? Check out Sarah is OK and find the post about childhood names. Until she declares a new winner, I will proudly display this bad boy right here!!!
P.S.- Want to know what my porn name is? Gonna have to head on over to Sarah's and find out. Neener neener neener.

Sonny Conversations

2008-01-27T14:35:00.000-08:00

As I was doing another blog roll check, I reached over and gave my little man's hiney a tweak (he has a bubble butt, and every time I see it balancing mid-air while he is playing on the computer, I can't resist the tweaking temptation) and here is the conversation that ensued after he was tweaked.

Buckwheat: "No, that's Buckwheat's hiney."

He gave me THE LOOK. I nearly recoiled in fear, then flung back at him with "No, that's mommy's hiney. I made it!"

Buckwheat: "No, Buckwheat made it!"

I looked at him for a moment, puzzled to the max that he would think such a thing. We argued briefly, most of the conversation repeating the first bit after I tweaked him yet again, then I informed him "Mommy made your hiney. It was in MY belly, while you were kicking and punching and hitting and being mean to me. IT'S MY HINEY!"

Yeah, I tend to be childish. He ended the conversation as he was walking away with "No, I made Buckwheat's hiney. It's mine."

He always has to have the last word. I have no clue where he gets that from. Certainly not me. Nope, nuh uh. Never.

He's My Man

2008-01-24T09:46:00.000-08:00

He's never caught one spy I'm told
He's never even caught a cold
Got his degree from Disneyland
He's the last of the secret agents
And he's my man
He's an underwhelming kind of sleuth
He thinks James Bond is some kind of suit
He's farther back than also ran
But he's the last of the secret agents
And he's my man
He'd come in third in a two-horse race
I've never had to slap his face
(What a shame)
Now people try to understand
He's the last of the secret agents
And he's my man
He's the last of the secret agents
And he's my man
He's the last of the secret agents
And he's my man

I heard this song last night during one of my many endless hours of sleepless rest. With a stomach bug that was confining me to the couch, I had the opportunity to watch plenty of movies, and when "The Man Who Knew Too Little" starring Bill Murray was ending, this song came on. I couldn't help but to think of T-Bone immediately.

Of course, he isn't a secret agent, but hey! The rest fits. And fits. And fits some more. To a T. Ha, T-Bone. SOrry, just amusing myself. Extreme case of boredom going on over here.

Really, I swear, it suits him. Sometimes he is so clueless that I have to wonder if he carries a good portion of his brain in his back pocket, refusing to take it out until it absolutely needs to be of service.

This man makes me laugh, he makes me want to scream, he makes me want to rip every single strand of hair out of my head sometimes. But I'd rather go through hell with this man by my side, than spend one moment in heaven without him. *tears* There, I gone and done it. Had to use my favorite line ever, from my favorite movie ever. And it gets me every single damned time. Almost like how people tear up during Jerry Maguire when she says "You had me at hello." Puh-lease. That's just blonde people! My line at least has some substance, and meaning, and other stuff.

I'm done rambling now. :D

Childhood Dreams; Shattered

2008-01-22T17:16:00.000-08:00

I had a dream when I was a child. I would dream that I was that lucky child on The Bozo Show that had the chance to play The GRAND PRIZE GAME! Many an early morning would I stare raptly at my television screen, while my mother shouted in the background about how I would go blind if I didn't move back, waiting for the GRAND PRIZE GAME portion of the show.

Each time the show came to that point, I would mentally play the game as if I were the child on the screen. I would toss that little ping pong ball into Bucket #1, and hear the satisfying little thunk it made as I effortlessly made it in. I would smile toothily for the camera, and pose with the Greatest Clown on Earth, Bozo.

I would make my way down the line, each little ping pong ball thunking nicely into the buckets as I made my way to Bucket #6. Many days I would have to live out my dream by my lonesome, since those darned kids on the show couldn't handle getting past Buckets #2 or 3. My dreams always ended with me nonchalantly tossing that cherished little ball into the air, with it landing nicely into Bucket #6 after swishing and teetering on the edge of the rim, to the "ooh's" and "aah's" of the crowd. After I was awarded my grandest of grand prizes each and every time, the audience would thunderously roar for an encore performance, and I would repeatedly sink that precious ball again and again.

By the time my mother interrupted me from my daydreams, I had won nearly everything but that Mansion in Beverly Hills that I dreamed of at the tender age of 6, 7, and 8. Possibly longer, but I wouldn't want to look like a foolish child for holding onto horrible dreams for so long.

Last night, I dreamed that I was on The Bozo Show. As dreams go, I was every character on the set at one time. My dream began with the opening credits, and me blasting onto the screen as none other than Bozo the Clown!
Don't ask why I have the head that I sported at 2 years old. It was a dream. Dreams do odd things, like revert us to the scabby-kneed, thumb-sucking, bed-wetting inner selves that we really are.

A little into the show, and the ever faithful sidekick, Cooky, hops onto stage. You can tell from the look on his face during every episode that he's really plotting of ways to kill off that big nosed red haired freak so he can be the center of attraction.
On with the show, and my delightful 2 year old self is loving the hopes and dreams that I'm able to fulfill at, albeit, such a late point in my life. No Bozo Show would be complete without the main attraction, Wizzo the Wiz! I would repeat his catch phrase for hours on end after watching each show... "Doody doody doody dooooo" in his oddly hypnotic voice, while trying to induce the twilight zone warp with his eyes. Mind you, repeating this phrase would entail being chased down by my mother and having the back of my pants pulled out so she could check to see if I had forgotten where the bathroom was. Even at the age of 8. I don't think she ever quite paid attention to the show.Yup, there's Cooky again. Trying to steal the limelight. He wanted to be a one man show. Yes, I realize that I'm both of them. Minds are evil things, and I wonder why I think I might have multiple personalities. It's the dreams, I tell ya!

The show ended with the grandest finale of all, the GRAND PRIZE GAME! My mind relived every childhood memory that I had ever played out, all of the way up to winning that mansion in Beverly Hills.
I think it would be in your best interest, as well as mine, to not wonder why I'm some short, fat dude with hairy legs. Again, I blame it on the dreams.

Got Me Some Header!

2008-01-21T18:53:00.000-08:00

Thanks to the magnificently wondiferous Ask Jewels, aka Princess Jewels, I now have a fitting blog header! I chose the image, and sayings, and she worked her magic for me! Wo0t!

She also just sent me a second header, that I will alternate here and there. I'm lovin' it!

Menu Plan Monday 1/24-1/31

2008-01-21T08:03:00.001-08:00

Yup, once again, Monday has managed to sneak behind enemy lines. Here's my menu for the week. Don't see something you like? Head on over to I'm an Organizing Junkie and take a look around at her Menu Plan Monday, complete with Mr. Linkie for other bloggers to leave their own!
Thursday- B-B-Q Chicken, Macaroni Salad, Baked Beans
Friday- Beef Burritos
Saturday- T-Bone Steak, Eggs, Home Fries
Sunday- Cheesy Manicotti
Monday- Grilled Cheese, Soup
Tuesday- Macaroni w/ Beef & Tomatoes
Wednesday- Leftovers

So, there you have it. Nice and simple. Well, I think it is anyway. Enjoy!

Sometimes I Wonder...

2008-01-19T17:15:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Sarah over at Ok, Where Was I?, I am posting the results to the quizzes I took, the ones she had shown on her blog. But why, do you ask? If you head over to her blog and look at her animology quiz, you will see why.

ANIMOLOGY: What Animal Are You? Your Result: Teal Cat You're the Teal Kitty Cat! You're as swift and sly as a ninja and very hard to please. You can be very soft yet very cruel at the same time. Your soul mate is the beige racoon and you're in conflict with the red jaquar.
Yellow Trout
Red Jaguar
Silver and Red Wolf
Gold Falcon
Blue Fox
Tan Giraffe
Ocre and Gray Dolphin
ANIMOLOGY: What Animal Are You?

Yup, I'm that Teal Cat that your momma warned you about. Awful huh? Just when you think you've found someone that you get along with, they turn out to have a hidden personality that you should have stayed away from in the beginning. I laughed so hard when I saw my results for that one, mainly because Sarah posted that "Come to think of it, I have always had trouble with teal cats--bitches. " I don't hold any ill wishes against you for disliking my kind, yet. Gimme some time to sulk over it, and you could become Public Enemy #1. Maybe. If you're special. :)
This one threw me, because it really has nothing to do with my personality. Maybe one of my millions of other personalities was front and center taking this quiz for me, the one that never shows her face because she knows that the other 999,999 personalities would lynch her ass for being so caring.

Your score on this personality test was 61%

Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.

Personality Quiz
Take More Quizzes

Make me laugh, why don't they? Fresh, lively, charming, practical? And really... well-balanced??? They must have been quizzing someone else. I'm fun, flirty, dangerous, bitchy, scheming, loud, boisterous, and hardly caring if something is certainly someone's own fault.
I also took the Hypochondriac quiz. I have to admit, that yes, sometimes, a little, I might come off as hypochondriac-like. Currently, I think I may seriously have kidney problems. They ache, they throb, they feel massive. I know I have to get them checked out, but I keep telling myself that it's nothing. I think that if this quiz had worded things a tad differently, then I would have had a lower (better) score.

You Are 43% Hypochondriac

You can deal well with being sick - even if your symptoms are a little scary.
You're occasionally prone to worry about your health, but only when you have pretty strange symptoms.

Are You a Hypochondriac?
Make a Quiz

This next one almost makes me want to curl up into a ball and cry for days, since my oldest is in 5th grade and probably knows all of the answer. Turns out that I don't really know how many sides a trapezoid has, how long a term is for a U.S. Representative, or that Polar Bears and Penguins don't live where I thought they do.

You are 70% Smarter than a fifth grader.

You are almost smarter than a fifth grader. If you just got a bit more right. Then, you would be considered smarter. Nice try. Try again.

are you smarter than a fifth grader?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

The following is so stupid that I thought of not posting it. But.. I have to be honest and at least say that I took it, and post you guys the results. Just keepin' it real. And just an F.Y.I., you should pop over to T-Bone's and leave him a comment asking how his answer for this next one turned out. He almost had a heart attack and ruined his destiny when he read his answer!

How will I die? Your Result: You will be murdered. This doesn't guarantee pain and suffering, but it will be at the hands of another. Perhaps the vile deeds of a past life will attribute to this horrific demise. Do not fear murder. There is a rare epiphany that comes from this type of death. You will see it in the last moments.
You will die from a terminal illness.
You will die while saving someone's life.
You will die in a car accident.
You will die in a nuclear holocaust.
You will die while having sex.
You will die of boredom.
You will die in your sleep.
How will I die? Create a Quiz

Last one, coming at you. And I swear, I find the ratty lil' bitch that came up with this quiz, then thought them out on what they mean, I'm gonna kick her ass. The nerve of talking to me like that!

You are 68% Bittch!

I can't believe it! Your almost a full bittch! I know you just sit there and think of ways to be a bittch! How Pathetic is that! You must be awful lonely! Cruelty hurts! Bittch!

How much of a B*tch Are you?
Create MySpace Quizzes

Super Freak Friday

2008-01-18T18:18:00.001-08:00

I admit, that sometimes this man comes up with the wackiest stuff, and it just makes me want to say "Uhhh..". Not Ahhh, like in the song, but "Uhhh". As we were driving home from picking up the older kiddies today, I mentioned to him that the next time we travel to a certain town and its surrounding areas, that I wanted to make sure I had my camera with me so I could take a certain picture to blog about.

He was onto me immediately, and knew what I wanted to blog about. T-Bone and I have been together for nearly four years, and I have to admit that this may be almost the only time that I completely thought that he must have been stupid beyond his years.

Years ago, we were leaving aforementioned town, and heading for a quaint little town nearby. On the way, there is a nice panoramic view of the hills off to the right of the town as you are entering into the village. Up on one of those hills, sits a "tree". The tree sticks out like a sore thumb, and the 30 or so times that we went by it in 6 months, T-Bone would always say "Damn that's an ugly tree. Someone really needs to go up there and cut it down." I would giggle, let it slide, thinking that T-Bone was being his usual self.

On one such trip, I was in a cranky mood and said "Yeah, I know. Someone really ought to go up there and cut that ugly tree down. You say that every time we go by that damn thing. I hope they take a chain saw that can cut through steel when they do."

It was T-Bone's turn to giggle. "Why would they want one to cut through steel? It's just a stupid tree." My eyes went wide with dawning as I realized what he was saying. I looked at him and said "You must be joking right. I mean, you really DO know what that is, don't you?"

I couldn't find a pic on the net of that precise "tree" but I did find one that looks almost identical. And since I'm out of blog material for right now and really wanted to post this, I figured it would suffice. Look closely.. do you know what's wrong with this tree??

How can anyone on earth who is at least partially in their right mind, not realize that this is a cell tower created to look like a tree. T-Bone never, ever, ever, knew that. EVER! He acted like I was joking, and I know I offered for him to pull off anywhere and I would ask anyone in that town what that tree really was, and he would get the answer I gave him.

So now, each time we pass this "tree", T-Bone says, naturally, "Someone really needs to go up there and cut that tree down."

Do I have any takers to get rid of said tree in our neck of the woods? The joke is getting old, someone please relieve me!!

7 Things I Hate (Random)

2008-01-17T09:24:00.000-08:00

I'm in a hateful mood today. Seems to be one of those things that hits me at least once a week, and usually it's just because some stupid little thing rubs me the wrong way. Most times, the only one who catches my hate is T-Bone, and he loves to refer to me as Mrs. Hyde when I'm in a "Hate the World" mode. Sometimes though, if T-Bone is super super lucky, the hate wears off before he wakes up for work. I'm not in the mood to be called Mrs. Hyde today. Let's keep our fingers crossed.

1. I HATE shopping. Hate hate hate it. I feel like my mind is trying to run away without the rest of me when I'm shopping, and it frustrates me.

2. I HATE doing dishes. T-Bone will vouch for that. There are times that I have been busy doing the dishes, and I can feel a nasty black cloud descending over me, and pulling my face into a sneer. Any and all thoughts that I am having, are now shrouded in black, and I'm suddenly staring into a deep dark abyss. Yes, that abyss is just my kitchen sink, but now it's not all chromey-and-shiney, it's now black and horrid looking.

3. I HATE folding laundry. That speaks for itself.

4. I HATE putting laundry away. Even more than I hate folding laundry. Go figure.

5. I HATE having to be nice to people that I really don't like. I'm not generally two-faced, and that is exactly how it makes me feel.

6. I HATE when you have high hopes for a specific event, and it turns out being a dud. Nothing worked out the way you were hoping. It's like a major letdown, and I hate being letdown.

7. I HATE more than anything, absolutely ever, is being touched in a store by a stranger. It literally makes me want to go home and scrub with a gallon of bleach, while using steel wool. I start to feel like I can feel millions of nasty little bugs running all over my body, just from the slightest brush from their sleeve. This one, is my hate hate hate, double hate peeve.

Although I only mentioned that I would post 7, I have to post just one more. Just one, I swear. I HATE HATE HATE, DOUBLE HATE, LOATHE ENTIRELY when another woman feels that a hug should entail a whole bunch of boobie bumping. I don't like my boobies being crushed by those of another female. I hate boobs, in general. I don't like the way they feel. And I definitely don't like the way they feel when they belong to someone else, who insists on trying to play boob-of-war during a slight embrace. Makes me feel, I dunno, like a pervert or something. I purposely try to avoid boobie bumping when hugging. It just grosses me out.
Ahhh.... I feel a little better now that I got some of all of that hate out of me. T-Bone might be alright after all!

Am I the Only One?

2008-01-16T18:12:00.000-08:00

T-Bone and I have engaged in this conversation on more than one occasion, and I always walk away from it feeling like I may just be a little more off my rocker than I thought I was when it started. Last night, before he left for work, we got into this conversation again, and I'm hoping that someone out there, anyone out there, has the same thing happen to them so that I don't feel so.. alone.
I have voices in my head. Not voices that speak up and tell me to hurt someone, or tell me to do something stupid, or anything equally psychotic. These voices are all versions of me, but for some reason, I have a TON of them.
There's the me that occurs whenever I have a normal thought, or when I'm thinking about what I want to come out of my mouth. That's fine, I guess. Everyone has this version residing in them, it's what makes us function.
On top of that voice, I have a ton of others. They all sound different, but they still sound like me (to me anyway). I will be having a clear, lucid thought process going on about something I'm thinking, or want to say, or want to do, or just memories. And in barges another voice, while the first continues. I can concentrate on, and understand, both at the same time. While the one may be rambling on about bills that have to be paid and how it's going to get done, the other will go off on a tangent about how I should stop being so lazy, and finish up the chores that I have around the house.
They don't always contradict each other in terms of what each is bringing to the table. One can be adding a whole list of numbers together from a sheet of paper, and the other will break in with some memory of T-Bone and I.
T-Bone, along with every other person I have talked to about this, says that he only has the one voice, and that he never has 2 things going on at once. It isn't like my mind is on autopilot, like where I'm able to do 40 sit-ups (which I can't, just for the record) exactly every time, while focusing on the tasks that I have to complete for the day. Anyone can do that. I can be doing those 40 sit-ups (which, again, I really can't do), budgeting my finances for the week, preparing a menu for the next week, thinking about what I have to do around the house for the day, mentally making a grocery list, and pine away for T-Bone all at the same time.
Sometimes, I like to think that I must have some sort of a super brain to be able to do all of this at once. Just to make a point, at this very moment I'm mentally writing this blog 3 lines ahead of where I'm actually typing (so I have one voice reading what is being typed, the other thinking about what will be typed), I'm going over a conversation in my head that I'm having with a friend in messenger, and thinking about things that I want to bring up for us to chat about, mentally thinking of all the things I want to do on other web sites, and chastising myself for not going to bed at a decent hour, or doing work around the house that should have been finished by now.
Is it really a wonder that 99 nights out of 100, I have a hard time falling asleep? Maybe that's why I have taken to not going to bed until I absolutely can't keep my eyes open anymore. I just don't like dealing with having to shut all of those voices out so that I can fall into a coma.
So, back to the topic of this post, am I the only one? I understand that people multi-task all of the time, I'm one of those people. But I think that my brain has crossed the lines of being in overdrive, and have stepped into the realm of warp speed!

'Cuz I Get On Your Nerves

2008-01-15T18:38:00.000-08:00

Do you have any idea what this is? Hmm... looks like a freezer. Even better, it looks like a freezer that hasn't had any thought given to what lies in that freezer. Looks pretty.. desolate, right? Needy? Wanting? Yearning?

I just spent 10 minutes freezing my fingers off by poking around in this poor freezer just so I can get on my sister's nerves. She hates me for being somewhat organized, I know she does. When I told her that I make menu's for every week, then a grocery list, and stick to it.. she told me I was stupid. When I told her that I purposely buy double what I need for the week.. she told me I was stupid. And when I unveiled to her this afternoon that I actually prepare, seal, and freeze the double portions for later meals.. she told me I was stupid.

This post is to show her what a happy freezer looks like. And do you know what happens when you have a happy freezer? You have a happy dinner. 'Cuz your smart ass only cooks it once, then freezes it, so you don't have to cook again. Journey into my happy little freezer, won't you?

Now this is a happy little freezer! You can almost hear some angel that is sitting on a nice chunk of ice with her harpsichord singing Hallelujah! when you open my freezer. It's such a beautiful place, that sometimes I wish to be a frozen ice cube just so I can snuggle up next to all of that perfect harmony in there. Just what do I have in my happy little freezer? Why, I thought you would never ask!

Just under that spiffy little space that holds my oddly girly looking ice cube trays on the upper left, is hidden the greatest gem in my freezer! Okay, I lied. It isn't the greatest, but it sounded good! For my menu almost 2 weeks ago, we had Bruschetta burgers. These call for store bought prepackaged burgers. I bought a box of 20 from Wal-Mart for $6 (unbelievable, right?), used half, and froze the rest after sealing them. Food Sealers are nifty gadgets, and well worth the price of the appliance and bags. So, look at that! I have a spare meal of burgers. Voila. Moving on...

There are actually 3 of these bad boys lounging in my freezer. These are my failed attempts at Stuffed Cabbage that we had tonight (I made them all last week). I did manage one tray of Stuffed Cabbage before the whole process fell to bits right before my eyes. Stuffed Cabbage and I don't get along, obviously. I'm still trying to figure out what I did to it for it to treat me this way. Maybe it will be revealed to me in a pint of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia® in the near future, disguised as a nice and plump black cherry. Yup, that made no sense. But you're still here, so we must be on the same wave length somewhere. Ahh, yes. What is this stuff then? Why, it's Unstuffed Cabbage Casserole! Always great to have a back up plan when it comes to Stuffed Cabbage gone wrong. I think I've looked at the Unstuffed stuff stuffs for too long, I think we should keep going....

Remember that nice tall stack of things on the top right part of the freezer? Here it is, all unraveled so we can marvel at it. We have (1) Creamy Mashed Potatoes, (1) Turkey Noodle Pot Pie, (1) Lasagna, and (2) Chicken Spaghetti Casserole. Umm, forgot to mention that they are in clockwise order, beginning with the bottom left of the picture and going around. Wouldn't need my precious readers getting all dis-com-bobulated on me! And of course, there was (1) Unstuffed Cabbage Casserole in the mix, but I set that in the freezer because I was sure that you really didn't need to see yet another of my failed attempts at Stuffed Cabbage.

On the bottom of my freezer, on the left, was a second pan of lasagna. I actually made 1 big thing of lasagna, and 2 small things of it (and I didn't have to buy anything more than I normally did to accomplish this amazing feat!). Of course, we demolished the first pan, between dinner, lunch, and T-Bone's lunch, that thing didn't stand a chance

Last night, we had Sausage Gravy over Pancakes. I already had a thing of frozen sausage in my freezer from some time back, so I purchased another and made a huge double batch. This is what was left afterwards. Man, this is going to be a nice, quick, super easy Sunday breakfast that I won't have to put any effort into at all. Want to know why? 'Cuz I was also smart enough to do this....
Uhhhh hhhuuuhhhh. Dat's Right. Those are spare pancakes. All freshly made last night, cooled, bagged, sealed, then frozen. You can award me with any of those nifty time saver trophies right now. I will gladly accept. Since I menu plan I know approximately a week and a half before I want to use anything, and have more than enough time to thaw it out. Ha!

Last, but certainly not least, is my freezer door. I didn't showcase this with the empty freezer, because I literally hauled everything out of it and threw it into the rest of the freezer so that it didn't look completely barren. The emptiness of it had me near tears, so I figured that I would spare my readers and fill the space. We have, in general, hashbrowns, italian meatballs, bacon, hot dogs, butter, and one of those freezer mugs. And down on the bottom rack, starting at the left, is a big bag of Turkey Noodle Soup (it was rolled up while unfrozen so that it would spare some freezer space), and next to it, a bag of chopped onions, green peppers, and red peppers. They all had to be used, so I diced them quick, then froze them. Next time I need them, all I have to do is thaw them out. Ta-da! Sometimes, I love being me.

Still thinking that you don't have the time to do this? Think again. Think really really really hard. If you are already making it, it will not kill you to make a little bit more, then freeze it. Can you imagine the time you saved making two pot pies at once, instead of 1, then another, at two different times? Man, that has to be harsh. The amount of time lost that you could have spent doing something totally useless! Use your head, get quick, get smart, get prepared. Your freezer will thank you.

Fat-10, Annie-0

2008-01-15T16:01:00.001-08:00

I think that my fat has an unhealthy fascination with the rest of my body. So unhealthy, that it doesn't want to leave. It cries and whines every time I even mention the word exercise, or even think it. It sobs for hours when I actually attempt to physically remove it through walking, jogging, or light cardio. It's starting to remind me of those pesky burdocks that cling to your socks after a walk through high grass. You can get rid of some of it, but certainly not all.

As of right now, the weight scoreboard for PorkChop is reading Fat-10, Annie-0. Of course, the most exercise that I have had in a month's time includes one slightly slumbering briskly walk around town about a week and a half ago while the weather was nice. Other than that, my fat has been rejoicing at my lack of total attention to it. I keep squeezing it into jeans that make it protest and squeak in terror, finally begging to be released after 2 or 3 hours in said clothing. I refuse to up my pants size yet again and let Fat gain one more point against me.

I went through some of my clothing last Saturday so I could make room in my dresser for others. I ran into jeans that made me want to curl up into a ball and cry the fat off my body (certainly, that has to take an awfully long time, so I decided against it 'cuz of an Ice Hockey game that I had to go to that night). I refused to throw those jeans out, as I have for about.. oh.. let's just roughly estimate... FOUR YEARS. Yup, 4 freakin' years, and I have refused to get rid of 5 or 6 pair of my favorite jeans. Why, you ask? It's simple. Someday, I will be a woman on a mission.

I will be a Laura Croft of sorts, decked out in my cute little sports bra top, hip hugging tights, and killer combat boots. My arsenal will consist of Fat-B-Gone, Ho-Ho-Disintegraters, and Twinkie Annihilator. No fat will dare to stand up to me, and any that does, will be blasted into oblivion. Yeah, someday that will be me.

Until the point to where I decide that great tasting food really doesn't matter, and that I don't need to eat other than to exist, I will have to endure the fat that clings to my waist, hips, and rear end. Like those pesky burdocks I mentioned earlier, I will have to find a way to co-exist peacefully with my fat until I get some willpower.

Did I mention that I'm allergic to willpower? *sigh* Well, I guess that I will have to keep starting and stopping exercise programs (or just mentally saying that I'm going to start one) until the fat decides that I've become uninteresting and leaves me for a new home. One that will nurture it, and love it, and call it George. I think that Kirstie Alley was advertising for something along those lines, maybe it will leave me for her. Ok, I can dream.

I will, once again, be mentally telling myself that I can and will be starting yet another program to rid fat. Not so sure about this one though, how can you turn a runner hater into a runner lover? We shall see. Maybe tomorrow I will link to what I found through someone else's site, called The Couch to 5k Running Plan. It basically eases you into running, so that during Weeks 1 & 2 you look like a blob trying to drag a deformed third leg behind them (a.k.a. FAT), and the weeks after that you actually look like you have done the running scene before, and that FAT has taken to chugging along with you, even keeping pace, until it melts away into oblivion. Ok, all that they endorse is that you might get to the point of enjoying running over a 2 month span. I embellished with the whole fat thing while I painfully recalled my last run in with running.

Blog Promotion Day!

2008-01-15T08:04:00.000-08:00

Yup, today is all about Blog Promotion! I will specifically be promoting 2 that I was linked to last night (they are family, so they get more attention), but while I'm at it, I'm going to be promoting my fave blogs, sites, and fly by's! Brace yourself, it's going to be one hell of a trip...

The Useless Knowledge of T-Bone is up and open for business. Well, reading anyway. Don't give him any ideas on selling things, he might decide to sell his soul. Yes, the rival of my affection, attention, and love.. has now moved onto my turf. Don't drop by his blog, it will give him a swollen head and he will be comparing site stats every minute of every day. He's obsessive like that. Want to know some useless stuff? Go see T-Bone, he's full of it!

Pop on over and check out my sister, I Don't Blog, What Am I Thinking?. Kick back with your favorite cup of calming, and experience some of her stories that come along with having not 1, or 2, or even 4 kids... but seven!! Cheer her on in her quest to do some justice in a situation that blindsided her.

KellyJean is a sweetheart of a lady with lots of insight into daily happenings in her life. Click on her name to check her out!

Mrs. Hallisicle leads you on a journey through the life of 2 weiners. Yup, I said weiners. Want to know what I'm really talking about? Head on over to her site and find out. But be warned, her loyal masses are as weiner crazy as she is! P.S.- She's running a contest right now, I just peeked at her site to get the URL and saw it.. I might be cutting this post short to head over and jump on in!

Other friends that you should check out? I have a few! Try these guys... Sarasponda, C Shell, and I'm No Belle.

What's that? Not enough blogs to fill your daily dose of blog goodness? Well, check out the column on the right that links to a few more of my faves. Be sure to look at them all, I will wait right here until you get back.

No I won't. I DO have a life, sometimes. And right now, this life is headed over to Hallie's to jump in on a contest! YAY!

Mixed Nuts 1/10-1/17

2008-01-14T17:25:00.000-08:00

As you can see, I found a rating button through someone's comment on a Wonderful World Of Weiners blog. At first, I posted just the URL to my main blog page, and it rated me a "G" for general audience. Turns out that the only word on my blog for the posts that are showing that it didn't consider proper material, was the word "dead" that appeared here, May They R.I.P..

I was honestly kind of upset that I was such a low rating, I try to be spellbinding and what not, and you can't do that with low key words. Really, if I talked of butts instead of asses, it just would NOT be me. So I plugged in the URL to my 2007 posts in their entirety, and have been awarded a proper "R" rating for the Year of 2007. I kind of enjoy that rating a bit more, gives people the feeling that they are about to read something sinful, and that they shouldn't let their parents be aware that they have stumbled upon this awesome blog.

I don't talk about sexually related content (although I could), I don't talk about controversial news items (like who's screwing who in the entertainment world), and I don't talk about risque politics (like that whole Monica thing, where she borrowed my blue dress and never returned it). I do, however, like to keep it funny, and light, and effing heart warming to those who drop by and sit a spell. So... enjoy my mixed nuts for the week!

~*~The night before last, T-Bone and I were returning home from an Ice Hockey game. Our local Classic Rock station was rambling on about something, and all I caught was how someone was doing their thing to their own theme music. I asked T-Bone what he thought his theme music would be, if he had to choose one. He didn't hesitate a bit, which almost caused me to rename him in my blogging house. "Super Freak" was his theme music choice. Miraculously, the moment he said it, I realized that it fits him to a capital T. You don't want to know my theme songs of choice, let's just say that my "R" rating would be moved to a "XXX" in a heartbeat.

~*~Last night T-Bone and I kicked back in front of the boob tube and watched movies all night. We signed up for NetFlix in the end of December, and it has honestly already paid for itself! It costs us $18.01 a month, taken out of our checking account through our debit, and it was taken out on the 3rd of January. As of today, the 14th, we have requested, received, watched, and returned, 12 movies. They come in 3 at a time, right to my own mailbox. All we do is return them in the same envelope they came in, and within 2 days we have new movies! If we were to rent those same 12 movies at our local video store (granting that they have them a) on DVD at all, or b) in the store and not rented) it would have cost us at least $36 already. Add in the late fees that I would have had since they are 2 day rentals, and you would have been looking at a small fortune! I highly recommend NetFlix to those who have considered it. We have yet to receive a DVD in condition poor enough that it wouldn't play, or would skip. I can't even get that guarantee around here! Now if only they carried an Adult rental section, I'd be in heaven!

~*~We also signed up for GameFly, while I'm on the online rental topic. It's the same thing as NetFlix, but you get games instead. They deal with any game that comes on disc for your console. We currently have a ps and a ps2, and are seriously considering a Wii. It does cost more on a monthly basis, and you get one less disc per rotation. We have already considered downgrading to 1 rental at a time. One of the games we received our first time around didn't work at all, so we had to report that. And the second, we had it mastered in a matter of 2 hours, tops. They also have the option to buy the games that you rent, for much cheaper than you can at even a place like GameStop. If you are considering this option, keep in mind that the games don't always work (obviously) and that it might be best to rent them one at a time so that you aren't focusing on 2 games at one time.

~*~While I was rambling on about NetFlix, I forgot the whole reason for that part of the mixed nuts. Movies that you should consider watching definitely include Deja vu (starring Denzel Washington), The Whole 9 Yards, and The Whole 10 Yards. Both of the Yards movies star Matthew Perry and Bruce Willis. Kick ass funny, so if you haven't seen them.. make sure you do! As for Deja vu, T-Bone and I loved it! It keeps you thinking the entire time, and there was very rarely a dull moment during the entire flick. If you're looking for a suspenseful thriller, put it on your Movies to View List!

~*~We found out on Friday that T-Bone might not be going to days as soon as we thought he was. They fired the guy that they hired to replace him, they found him curled up in a ball on the floor, sleeping, during shift. I was really looking forward to being able to snuggle in bed with him for more than 3 nights out of 6, but we will keep our fingers crossed and hope that the company finds another solution!

Alright, enough Mixed Nuts, it really was a pretty uneventful week. Other than me moaning in pain all morning, then napping on the couch for a bit, things have been rather peaceful. Somehow I get trapped gas in my digestive tract, and the pain is absolutely horrendous. Even over the counter medication isn't working anymore, and it's getting more frequent. Nasty stuff, really. But I won't bore you with the details!

Menu Plan Monday 1/17-1/24

2008-01-14T10:40:00.000-08:00

I vowed not to talk to myself this week on here about how I knew yesterday that today was Menu planning, and yet here I am, mid-day, just realizing it. I vowed I wouldn't talk about that. I wouldn't make a great spy or anything like that, 'cuz I just can't seem to keep my mouth shut. So, without much ado (ok, so there was a little bit of fanfare).. I introduce my weekly menu! P.s.- This menu is coming right off the top of my head. I'm making it up RIGHT NOW! Ha, talk about organized!
Thursday- Taco Salad
Friday- Homemade Sloppy Joe's
Saturday- Pork Roast, Homemade Mac 'n' Cheese, Mixed Veggies
Sunday- Chili
Monday- Shepherd's Pie
Tuesday- French Toast, Eggs, Sausage
Wednesday- Leftovers

T-Bone was absolutely no help this week with the menu, go figure. Then, as he was looking at the menu and trying to decide what he wanted to add, he tried to cop out with "oh, I was going to say taco salad" or any of the others already here. I told him what for, and he decided on breakfast on Tuesday. Sweet of him, non?

For tons more delicious menus, check out Org Junkie's Menu Plan Monday topic, and find some new ideas!

May They R.I.P.

2008-01-09T21:00:00.000-08:00

T-Bone and I stepped out for a morning cigarette earlier today. The usual honks and quacks that usually greet us didn't ring through the warm January air. I was on the phone, so I didn't pay any attention to the lack of duck calls.

T-Bone noticed, and looked down the yard at the duck pen. "Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack", he bellows out, while I'm trying to talk to somebody about a balance on my current taxes that I'm paying tomorrow. I nudged him, shooshed him, and turned back to the phone.

"I think all of the ducks are dead!" he mumbles to himself, just loud enough so I can hear it. He runs inside, gets out of his morning attire, and heads down the yard. Just as I'm finishing up my call, I hear him saying "shit" loud enough for it to carry from way down in our yard, all the way up to the porch.

Something had entered our duck pen in the middle of the night, and slaughtered our poor ducks. All 4 of them. Not a one was spared, and it was a blood bath. I will spare the gory details, but they were more than likely killed out of sport, and not for food.

T-Bone took care of the mess, giving our poor ducks as decent a burial as possible with the ground being frozen.

I hate to think the fear those poor ducks were in as they watched helplessly during their last moments. I'm kind of loathing myself for not having an inaccessible space for them to be during the night time hours so that things that don't roam around during the day wouldn't have been able to get to them. But it just wasn't possible, being that any of the sheltered areas we had were designed for goats, making it easy to get to the yard. Therefor, leaving a huge entry way that would have been easy to get into anyway.

Although I'm going to miss them, that will be my one and only venture into Duckdom. They were pretty much low maintenance, but when they decided to visit the neighbors down the road, they were really hard to get back. Ever try to carry three ducks at once? I have, it's a nightmare!

One more pic of my babies. I used to have T-Bone chase them down, and bring them to me so I could rub their chests. They were so soft! Honestly, if I could have persuaded one of them to sit still long enough, I would have fluffed that little duckling up like a pillow and taken a nap on its chest. It has to be one of the softest things ever.

Hewey, Lewey, Tuck & Buck... rest in peace my ducklings!!

Menu Plan Monday 1/10-1/17

2008-01-07T07:24:00.000-08:00

Another week of menu planning, hooray! I remembered that it had to be done yesterday. And lo and behold, once today hit.. I forgot about it. It seems like I would have spent last night looking for recipes for the week, since I'm already tired of the same ol' same ol'. It's going to take a while to put this week together!
Thursday-Old Fashioned Goulash, Garlic Toast
Friday-Ranch Chicken Meatloaf, Mashed Potatoes, Spinach**I will be using ground beef**
Saturday-Italian Meatball Soup and Salad
Sunday- Pot Roast, courtesy of The Pioneer Woman Cooks
Monday- Sausage Gravy and Biscuits, Eggs **I will be making a couple of pancakes for T-Bone for this one, he loves his sausage gravy over them
Tuesday- Stuffed Cabbage **T-Bone request of the week
Wednesday-Leftovers

As you will notice, a lot of recipes are linked this week! And most of them have previously been tried by my family, so I'm not shooting in the dark with them, having to wonder if my family will eat it. We especially love the Italian Meatball Soup.

Most of these can be found on an awesome website, 400 Five Ingredient Recipes. I found myself over there last year when I was trying to make it through on less than $200 a week. It was rough, but that site helped out enormously!

I will also be making a dessert that will probably last all week (for me anyway) since T-Bone isn't OVERLY fond of it. That's ok, more for me lol.
Crockpot Caramel Rice Pudding. As a side note, this dish is not all creamy and pudding-ish. It is more of a sticky rice, but it is oh so good!

Okay, I'm tired of thinking about food. Now I'm hungry. Off to munch!

Win A Hamilton Beach® Stand Mixer!

2008-01-05T19:06:00.000-08:00

A Cowboy’s Wife is having a contest on her food blog! You can Win a Hamilton Beach® Stand Mixer and she’ll ship anywhere so everyone is eligible!

The Prize:

The winner will receive a brand new

Hamilton Beach 4.5-qt. Eclectics Stand Mixer, in Pineapple Yellow!

About the mixer:

From Hamilton Beach’s “Eclectrics” line, this all-metal stand mixer comes with a host of accessories - a Flat Beater for cakes and cookies, a Dough Hook for bread and a Wire Whisk for whipped cream or pudding. The 4.5-qt. stainless steel bowl comes with a Pouring Shield that helps prevent splattering while in operation. The pouring shield has a built-in chute for adding ingredients. Powered by 400 watts, the stand mixer has a two-way mixing action to ensure all ingredients are incorporated into the mix. The quick-release, tilt-up head assists when removing the bowl. 9 x 14 x 14-in. When you’re ready for a kitchen re-do, don’t call in the carpenters! Instead, “counterscape” your kitchen with Hamilton Beach’s retro-designed, affordably priced electrics in happy, sun-saturated colors. Their “Eclectrics” line includes updates to those classic appliances from the 1950s. All of their “Eclectrics” are available in six colors: Apple Green, Moroccan Red, Pineapple Yellow, Intrigue Blue, Sugar White and Licorice Black.

***I need this bad boy, and in licorice black! I've been holding out for a KitchenAid®, but just looking at this puppy is making me absolutely drool!***

Know what's coming up? Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Seems like a good day to give gifts, so anyone out there feeling extra generous (and with quite a bit of spare change to waste) can stuff one of these in their purses and then ship it my way. What's that? Not a good enough reason to get gifts?

Man, you guys keep making me resort to begging....

T-BONE!!! GEMME DAT PWEASE!!

*He's going to stop visiting my blog after he sees that, I think he might be getting tired of the long list of I-Want's that he finds here.*

Go sign up already!

Is It Even Possible??

2008-01-05T10:47:00.000-08:00

To divorce your dad? Sometimes I wish, well, quite occasionally I wish, fine! I'll admit it.. nearly every day I wish I could. This man is slightly.. impossible.
He has a great, big, giant heart. But he hasn't yet realized that he is nearing his 50's. He is quite literally stuck at the age of 18.
My dad excessively drinks, eats hardly at all (and when he does, it's not very healthy), and lives dangerously. Here's a dad scenario just to prove my point, that has happened just this week.

(This is the precise Yahoo! conversation that I had with my older sister, taken from archives)

Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:35:18 PM): I have Kirk going to check on Dad
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:35:32 PM): why
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:36:14 PM): cause he doesn't answer the damn phone
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:37:22 PM): what makes u think hes home
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:37:57 PM): he was tearing a wall out and hasn't called anyone since 10 and not answering the phone
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:38:28 PM): im sure hes around somewhere
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:38:38 PM): what is he got electricuted or something
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:38:47 PM): he refused to turn the breakers off
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:38:57 PM): oh im doubting that
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:39:00 PM): how long ago did kirk go
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:39:06 PM): just a minute ago
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:39:13 PM): just got off phone with him
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:39:21 PM): oh
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:40:33 PM): he is gonna call me when he gets back home
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:40:45 PM): i figured that lol
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:42:12 PM): he just called Ann
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:42:21 PM): he is near Honesdale somewhere
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:42:26 PM): lmfao
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:42:29 PM): thought as much
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:42:32 PM): she isnt happy
Scott n Nancy (1/3/2008 3:42:37 PM): she hung up on him
Prncz Biotch (1/3/2008 3:42:38 PM): thats dad for ya

I'm the Prncz Biotch one, Scott n Nancy is my older sister. I never did hear from her again that night, so I assumed that everything was doing well concerning my dad. By the way, Ann is his newly acquired girlfriend, who happens to be my older sister's SIL.
We returned home yesterday after picking up the older guys, and as always, my answering machine light was blinking. I hit the play button, and there was a typical dad message on it.
"What do you mean, you're not home? Are you really there? Are you sleeping? Are you having sex? Do you not want to talk to me? Are you outside smoking a cigarette? Are you ignoring me? Anyway, this is dad. Give me a call when you get home. Love ya."
Seriously, those are always the types of messages on my answering machine from him. So, I tried his cell and got his voice mail. I left a brief message telling him we had just returned home, and to give me a call. I hung up the phone.
So, I'm getting ready to set the phone down, and it rings. The caller ID is showing it to be dad. I answered, we are mid-greeting when he says "Oh, someone just left me a voice mail! Wonder who it was?" I'm sitting here thinking that normally I wouldn't know, so why he even bothered to ask was beyond me. I told him it was me, and he continued the conversation.
"So, I thought that maybe you weren't answering the phone because you were made at me like everyone else."
I asked him why I would have been mad at him, and he says "Oh, you mean to tell me you haven't heard?" Of course, I hadn't heard. I live under a rock, and have nearly no outside communication.
I regaled him with what I did know about him, which included the above conversation I had with my sister.
"Hell yeah I ripped out the entire wall in my kitchen! AND I refused to shut off the electricity to the room. I know what I'm doing. It's all good. But that isn't what everybody and their brother is pissed off about." So, I play along and ask him what the problem is.
It seems that he was down in a town in PA (he lives in NY) with his cousin. The cousin that just last week robbed him blind of his stone quarry equipment, then robbed his house, and admitted it to my father's face. Guess they kissed and made up. Myself, I would have paid to have that guy flogged before a tarring and feathering.
Now, as soon as he said that a) he was in PA, and b) he was with his cousin, I knew that there had been some trouble. Possibly major. You can't get those two peons together without something monumentally death defying going on.
Such was the case, as I found out. They had a "little accident" as my dad put it. I don't see where voluntarily flinging one's own body off a nearly 50 foot drop into a snow bank is a "little accident". But he says toe-may-toe, I say toe-mah-toe. Thankfully, his cousin wound up needing over 50 stitches after having to be taken to the hospital by my dad. Guess that it takes nearly 4 towels full of blood soaking, with bleeding still afoot, before a hospital visit occurs.
I say thankfully that he needed them, I honestly wish this guy some ill will. He should have taken the stitches, I would have loved the discomfort it would have caused him. Being the "manly man" that he is, he settled for a ton of butterfly stitching and called it a night.
Dad didn't make it out without his own trophies from his high dive. If I recall what he said (at this point, I was merely wincing as a migraine came on due to his story), it included either a broken or sprained foot (pretty sure it was broken though), dislocated knee, and bruised shoulder.
He went to visit his girlfriend yesterday. She met him at the door, told him off, and vowed that she was done with him. I don't quite see that happening, but I guess that time will tell.
Dad's conversation closer included the old "guess I should call the family and tell them where I am before I take off so that no one worries" and the very famous "you know me, I like to live on the edge.. I haven't been killed yet". Oh, but what really, really, really effing burned my ever loving ass, was when dad socked me with this one right before we said our goodbyes.
"Little G got some awesome pics of it all though! He was flying through the air and taking as many pictures as he could on the way down."
I have a father for sale. Really cheap. Like, I'll pay you to take him.
Okay, he isn't all that bad. I mean, really. I can dismiss the fact that I still remember when he threatened to drive the whole family into a jutting rock wall while doing nearly 90 mph in a little Ford Escort. Guess the nasty combination of drugs and alcohol can do that to ya, so I can forgive him that.
Or the fact that up until July 2007, he never called unless he needed something. Or that he was never really a father to me while growing up, after our parents separated.
Seriously, I can forgive that.
I CANNOT forgive, however, the fact that for the first time since any of the grandchildren have been born (so that goes back nearly 15 years) they actually know their grandfather. They see him quite a bit, we spent some serious family time together at the end of summer, and they don't need for one of us to have to explain that "Gee guys, we are really sorry that grandpa is no longer with us. Just remember that when you want to jump off something really high, wear the proper protection."
I mean, as if. He needs to stop and think about what he is doing! He sends at least one of us children into a tizzy at least once a month since he has moved closer. I realize that he isn't used to having us care what he does, but we have told him repeatedly that he needs to keep us filled in.
I'm not even sure if half of this post makes sense anymore, but it's there. I feel a little better.

One more dad pic before I go...
This is dad, New Year's Eve. He wasn't drunk (in dad speak anyway), but I think that someone had food fall on the floor and he was trying to beat the 5 second roll by diving after it. He is on my sister's floor in this pic.

Gotta love him.

Bracelets & Caricatures, How Can You Go Wrong With These?

2008-01-04T08:39:00.000-08:00

Through the absolutely, wondiferously amazing, super-cool KellyJean's site, I ran into two great giveaways that deserve a ton of mentioning! (Can you tell that KJ is now my fave person, wait, her hubby is, but ssshhh.. since I won a super cool organizer on her blog??)

For those who like to enter things that have a just cause behind them, head on over to Elysa's site and check out this post for her giveaway. She, her friends & family, have been making super cool jewelry to sell. And just what does their Jewelry fund? Their missionary trips to Swaziland, Africa! While you're over there, give thought to helping out by making a purchase or two, or maybe 500. Follow the directions in that post, and be entered to win some of her uberrific jewelry!

Rick, from over at Organized Doodles will be giving away not one, but TWO grand prizes! And grand they are.. this man knows how to caricature almost anything! Follow the instructions on that post, and be entered to win one of two of his grand prizes. A caricature that can be found anywhere on his site (as long as it wasn't specifically done for someone else), as a print is Grand Prize #1, and Grand Prize #2 is a specialized, customized, caricature of any photo that you wish to send him, within his posted guidelines.

You're still reading this? Free stuff, get a move on! Go, Go, GO!!!

Never Leave...

2008-01-01T19:00:00.000-08:00

Your open adult beverage on a table while you step outside for a quick smoke with your hubby. Especially when that table is occupied by 2 types of people. Old ladies, and drunk men. In fact, these people below just might be the kinds of people that you wouldn't allow your drink alone with......

This is my magnificent, and evil, grammy.

The older guy is Unc. The younger, my brother. He used to beat me up if I wouldn't get him a bowl of cornflakes while he watched Mr. Roger's Neighborhood on PBS. He was 15 at the time, go figure.

The guy in this pic happens to be my BIL. Looks innocent, don't he? Think again.

Now, here I was trying to enjoy not only New Year's Eve, but MY birthday also. I normally don't drink, so the fact that I was actually indulging in one or two, maybe even 6, adult beverages, was enough to pique their interest.

What held even more interest for them, was the fact that the bag I carried my poker change inside with, happened to be sporting two tampons also. Yes, my body hates me and did not want me to enjoy either occasion. And no, I had no shame in keeping my feminine items in plain view of everyone. We've discussed much worse over family dinners during Thanksgiving, so the appearance of those bad boys weren't a real shocker.

Although, when my barely buzzing body stepped back inside after enjoying the cool weather with a cigarette and went to take a sip of my adult beverage, I was smacked with a nasty feeling that something was awry. Can you tell what it was?
For a split second, I didn't know what it was. Then I looked at my poker money bag, and noticed something missing. Where there once was 2 tampons, I now had 1. The other resided, as you can see, in my drink.

Now, the funny thing is, you see what looks like layers of cardboard in there? Uhh yeah, they forgot to remove the applicator. They just slam dunked the whole thing into my drink. They were hoping that the cotton of the tampon itself would have absorbed what liquid I had in my bottle, and would have filled the area up.

When I pointed out that they failed to remove the applicator, so that never would have happened anyway, my brother, BIL, and grammy all said they had no clue what I was talking about. What the hell was an applicator?

I laughed hysterically. Everyone at the table was having a good laugh over it too, but they nearly fell out of their chairs when I announced (cover your eyes for those offended by foul language) "Fuck it!" and took a swig out of the bottle with the tampon still in it. My sister managed a pic of me doing it, and threatened to post it here. She doesn't have the right to my blog, so I'm safe.

What she doesn't realize, is that as soon as she sends it to me, I will post it myself! I have no shame. It's all good.

Hope your New Year's went as well as mine did!

'Cuz You Look Like A Monkey...

2008-01-01T18:16:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!!

I thought of posting an embarassing pic of T-Bone for his birthday. Then realized that I don't, as of yet, have any.

So I settled for second best, and chose the one of him with my niece Kachow, taken at my family Christmas party last Saturday.

He still needs a shave, but for some reason, I still find him extremely adorable. He must be growing on me.

Here's to a year of being the big 28 honey! Love you!

P.S.- I'm still an hour and 57 minutes older than you, and since you don't have a blog, you can't rub it in that you are younger. :)

Menu Plan Monday 1/3-1/10

2007-12-31T07:56:00.001-08:00

I missed last week's posting for MPM, and had a bitch of a time trying to figure out what to eat all week with all of the holidays, gatherings at the last minute, and parties that I remembered the day before we were supposed to be there. Plus, late Christmas Shopping kept me away from home, so the menu wouldn't have helped me out much anyway. Well, on hindsight, I would have had the spare ingredients and could have worked them into this week's menu. But I'm almost prepared this week! YAY!

Ok, on to the menu. Since a couple of the dishes that I am preparing have recipes from other sites, I will be linking to those. Feel free to click your way on over and take a peek!

Thursday- Mozzarella Stuffed Chicken, Baby Red Mashed Potatoes, Green Bean Casserole
Friday- Chicken Spaghetti Casserole, courtesy of The Pioneer Woman
Saturday- Turkey w/ Gravy, Mashed Potatoes, Cranberry Sauce, Corn, Rolls (late Christmas Dinner w/ the Runts)
Sunday- ***Bruschetta Burgers***, Homemade Mac n Cheese, Butter Beans (***recipe below)
Monday- Turkey Soup, Crescent PinWheels
Tuesday- Turkey Noodle PotPie
Wednesday- Leftovers

As you can see, the pricey Mozzarella Stuffed Chicken (and all the fixings) is still on my list. Why is that? Because Annie decided that she needed to take the day that she was supposed to be making that dinner and go shopping. And because Annie went shopping in the town where her 2nd favorite restaurant is. The 2nd favorite restaurant that she barely gets to visit once a year, if lucky. Did Annie mention that she loves Brook's House of Bar-B-Q? This place has actually been featured on $40 a day with Rachael Ray. I was so excited during that episode because I had actually been somewhere that someone famous was at! Ok, so I'm easily amused. Click on the name for their online store, and be ready to be blown away by some awesome meat marinades!

P.S.- Just an afterthought, for those looking to stalk me and think that they have a better chance of doing so since I just posted a link to a restaurant that only exists in Oneonta, NY.. think again. Annie travels a long way to get that savory goodness. :)

Onto the Bruschetta Burger thing. I actually saw something somewhere for some sandwich being advertised that was something like the whole Bruschetta thing. Then I got smart, realized I could put a twist on it (and keep it simple) and wowed T-Bone with it. He actually requested to have these this week, which is something he hardly does. He doesn't know what we have from one night to the next, so I felt ~~pressured~~ compelled to make it for him.

***These are served as open faced sandwiches***
1 box Texas Garlic Toast (this will feed 4 people, 2 sandwiches each)
Hamburger Patties (I use the store made that come in a box, feel free to use fresh meat) **I calculate 2 per person**
1 can diced tomatoes (I purchase the Garlic & Onion variety by Del Monte®)
1 bag shredded Mozzarella
1 can mushrooms, chopped
2 cans beef gravy

**Did I mention that this recipe is all about prepackaged, easy to compose, goodness? Prolly not. If you don't like prepackaged, wade your way through the recipe and use fresh. But for Pete's Sake, don't preach to me about using prepackaged foods. I'm not preaching to you about not using them**

Anywho... go ahead and prepare your burgers any way you like (just please, for the sake of bacterial nastiness, at least cook it a little). Take the toast, put it on a baking sheet, and follow the package directions for preparation.
Once done, adorn serving platters with the garlic toast. Open the can of diced tomatoes, heat it any way you like, then top the garlic bread with it. Throw a burger on top of the tomatoes, cover in mushroom pieces, throw on a healthy dose of mozzarella, cover in heart stopping gravy. Eat with a fork, unless you love licking your fingers. It's quite messy.

Okay, I have spent entirely way too much time doing this Menu Plan this week. It's awful. I thought of preparing it last night so I didn't have to do it today. As you can tell, I'm not quite organized yet. For those who don't make menus, and think they are a waste of time.. do yourself a favor and at least give it a shot. Make the menu, compile a grocery list. You will find that you will save a lot of money in groceries because you aren't randomly throwing things in your cart that you think you will have for dinner. You will also find that (if you are at least slightly organized) your meat is always defrosted and thawed out so that you don't have to spend time trying to change it from it's icy state to something usable, and you can blog instead. Or do laundry.

Love Free Stuff? Share Your Funnies, and Win It!

2007-12-30T18:09:00.000-08:00

The fabulous KellyJean over at Laughing Always Helps is hosting her first ever blog contest!
And just what is your incentive to head on over there and enter, you might ask? Just check out this marvelous can't-live-without-it-must have prize!

And I'm thinking that I can't live without this organizer & planner myself. Even if I don't win the contest, I seriously think that I will be investing in one anyway!
Back to the contest. Pardon me for getting sidetracked, I was in mental organizing heaven for a moment there. Head on over to KellyJean's site by clicking here. This link will take you specifically to the post that you are looking for. She specifically lists the guidelines for this contest, but I will post them here for you to get you psyched up to head over!

The Rules: 1. Tell a funny story (embarrassing ones are GREAT!) in the comments section on my blog. 2. Mention it on your blog with a link back here.

Also, don't forget to make it a habit to drop by KellyJean's blog when you are making your rounds. She's a wonderful lady, with a talent for writing & blogging.

For those looking for other sorts of organizing tools, check out the Family Facts Online Store. While you're there, toss one of these big bad babies into your cart.....

THEN.... leave me a comment so I can e-mail you my address and you can send it to me. Ok, I have no shame. I just thought it would make a nice birthday present from you to me. Really, it's my birthday in approximately 3 hours, give or take.

What's that? I'm on my own? *sigh* I guess I will have to drop subtle hints to T-Bone that I want it.

T-BONE! GEMME DAT PWEASE?!?!?

My Fall From Psychotic Pt. 7

2007-12-23T17:59:00.000-08:00

T-Bone flipped the box over, where a diagram of the see through window results were displayed. He looked at the test in his hand, back at the box, and at the test again. Then looked my way.
"It says... that I'm going to be a father."
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It was confirmed a couple of days later by my OB/GYN that I was indeed pregnant, and the estimated due date was set for February 11th. I was nervous, and scared. The last pregnancy I had kept running rampant through my mind. Nightmares of a duplicate pregnancy kept me up late at night.
T-Bone broke it to his mother that we were expecting. I guess that the information was received alright, but it wasn't overly joyous. And she made him promise something, something he never told me about until after the baby was born.
A little over a month after finding out that I was pregnant for sure, I returned home from a day of work. I went to the bathroom to relieve myself to find that I was bleeding. I went into hysterics, and called T-Bone up.
He rushed me to the emergency room, both of us fretting the whole way over. Thankfully, it turned out to be nothing more than a very serious urinary tract infection that was causing the bleeding.
On June 29th, T-Bone's mother passed sort of unexpectedly. She had been diagnosed with Breast Cancer a couple of years before, and she came down with Pneumonia. T-Bone was deeply distraught that she wouldn't get to see the baby, and it was difficult for months after her funeral for him to accept that she was gone.
On July 19th, I received a long distance call from my aunt telling me that my 93 year old great grammy had passed. I was upset that no one had called me earlier, she had passed the afternoon of the 18th. Sitting down to ponder how I was feeling emotionally, I heard T-Bone's scanner tone off for our town.
I heard a somewhat familiar address, a somewhat familiar last name, and an age was given. The lady was down in the yard, unresponsive, and CPR was in progress. My heart beat started galloping along as I called my mother at work.
I asked her for my grandmother's address, and she got a little haughty. I was, after all, calling her at work to get it. And she had no clue why. Urgently, I pressed on. She gave it to me, and I asked if she was the age that the scanner had given me. I had already figured out why the name they gave was familiar. It was her previous last name. As my mother confirmed the age on the scanner, I broke down crying so hard I couldn't speak.
My mother was nearly screaming into the phone, asking what my problem was. I was finally able to break through the speech barrier, and I cried into the phone "It's gram! A call just came over the scanner that she is down in the yard and she isn't responding. They are doing CPR right now."
I don't think that a sound has ever ripped my heart out the way my mother's moans of anguish did that day. She immediately went hysterical, blaming me for what was happening, as I cried harder. I know she didn't mean it, I honestly wonder if she ever remembers what she said at all.
"NO NO NO! Why are you doing this to me? Why would you do this? NO NO NO!" I cried in helplessness as the phone went dead in my ear. She left work immediately, leaving everyone to wonder what was happening. Her Boss, Linda, waited impatiently by the phone to hear word of what was happening. My grandmother was an employee of hers also, and more like family to her than anyone.
I called T-Bone at work, or tried to. I couldn't get a hold of him for the life of me. My supervisor from work got a hold of me, and asked if I wanted to be taken to T-Bone's place of work so I could try to get him to run me to the hospital. I hadn't heard a word yet as to what was going on, and I figured that the hospital was the place to be.
My supervisor dropped me off at the scale house, and I was able to get T-Bone out of work and headed for the hospital. My stress levels were skyrocketed beyond belief.
We arrived nearly as fast as we had the day he received the call that he should see his mother before she passed. It was deja vu, the scenery, the settings, the whole circumstance. Except I was in his shoes, and he was in mine.
As I walked near the emergency room entrance, I saw my mother standing outside with my stepfather. The closer I got, the more I could see that she was crying. She looked my way, and immediately walked toward me.
"You shouldn't be here! You are supposed to be on bed rest, and you should be thinking of that baby. Go home, please just go home!" But I couldn't go home. I just couldn't do it. I needed to be there, to make sure everything was alright.
"I came to make sure that Gram is okay. How is she?" Being with an EMT, I should have known. T-Bone didn't say it on the way over as I fretted, he reassured me that things would be alright. He didn't have the heart to tell me that it was very hard to bring someone back with CPR. And I found out as my mother looked at me, what T-Bone wouldn't tell me.
"They couldn't save her. She's gone. She's inside, and Bob is with her, but she's gone. You don't need to go in there, you don't need to upset yourself. She just isn't... here anymore." And this is where I went into shock.
My grandmother was a very self-sufficient woman. She never asked anyone else to do something for her, she was proud of accomplishing something on her own. She was a self-made woman, and everyone knew it. She was harsh, she was to the point, and she was still forgiving. And now this strong woman was gone, with no warning whatsoever.
I don't know why I tried to kid myself that she was okay. I should have known that a woman of her stature was only going down if she was long gone, but I couldn't accept it. I couldn't accept that this woman who scared me so much with her demeanor, while at the same time trying to give me a push in the right direction, went down without a fight.
I turned to T-Bone then, asked him to take me home. And he did, without a word. I explained to him on the way home that my great grandmother had passed the night before, and I had received that call mere moments before I heard the scanner go off for my grandmother. I was double whammied, and I was in rough shape.
I attended two funerals that week. My great grandmother's was a lot easier, she was getting up there in years, and it's to be expected. My grandmother's funeral was horrible, and making it through the day alone was more than I could take.
Unc, the youngest child, stood over her grave during the service, crying buckets silently. It was so rough to watch, and the sniffles and crying going on from everyone were more than I could handle. I still couldn't believe it. I still don't want to believe it.
I took her for granted, all of the time. I called her a bitch behind her back when I didn't get things my way, or when she pointed out how stupid I was being. I hated myself for all of the times that she stepped up and tried to help me out, and I was so ungrateful for it. And I could never, ever, tell her that I was sorry. Or thank her for all that she had done for me.
It's been well over 3 years since she passed away. And each time I go by her house, where her husband Bob still lives, something inside me breaks, and I have to look away. I think about the poor old man inside its walls, having to look at all of the memories of her each and every day.
I found out a little after the funeral that things didn't bode well the day that my grandmother passed away. Each one of us children have scanners in our house, and 3 of the 4 of us showed up while the ambulance was there loading her up. My older brother and sister, and my younger sister. I was the only one missing.
My brother didn't hesitate as he showed up to pass the blame. I can't blame him sometimes, because the anger he must have had was pent up as thick as it could have been. He wasn't thinking straight, but I'm sure he has his moments where he could change it all if he could.
Bob was outside, crying and fretting. Bob is a big, tough, burly guy. He complemented my grandmother's demeanor. When my brother showed up, his anger took over and led him up the sidewalk to Bob.
His fist flew first, landing squarely as he screamed at Bob for being a lazy bastard, for allowing a woman of her age out in the hot blistering sun to do a man's job. For being too stupid to do it himself. For everything. He was pulled off, by then he knew she wasn't alive.
I think if I had been there that day to witness it, I would have passed the blame too. I would have been seeing red too brightly to realize that Bob had nothing to do with it.
You see, my grandmother wore the pants in that family, as much as she tried to act like she didn't. And even a man as big as Bob couldn't keep her down. She saw that the lawn needed to be mowed, so she did it. As I said before, she didn't ask someone else to do something for her.
Things settled down after a while, somewhat. Mom was so in shock over it that she wasn't really herself for months. Bob was invited to the Christmas Party at Mom's that year. None of us wanted to be there for a gathering, and having Bob show up was making us all nervous.
As we showed up one by one and inspected the tree, we saw something on the tree that shouldn't have been there. It was there every other year, but this year was different, and none of us were expecting to see it.
Four envelopes adorned my mother's tree. Each one had a name written on it, in my grandmother's handwriting. I think that all of us were so shocked that none of us wanted to open them. We all stared at our envelopes, each of us in our own thoughts so deep that we didn't notice a thing around us.
One of us finally came out of our trance, and started to open the envelope. The rest followed, and cards were pulled out of each simultaneously. Inside each card, in her simplistic yet gram-ish handwriting, were best of wishes for the New Year, and a crisp, gram-ish $50 bill.
The silence in my mother's living room was deafening as we all slowly absorbed in our own way the significance of those cards on the trees. How meaningful they were, and the statement that they made.
The statement was that gram, in all of her time consuming activities, had planned ahead by more than half a year to make sure that her grandchildren always received their gifts. I sometimes wonder if she did this "just in case" something happened to her.
I silently folded the money, and tucked it into my pocket. It was such a shock to see it, that I didn't want to let go of it. I didn't want to let go of a piece of her that had resurfaced after more than 5 months.
I had one more gram-intruding shock a few months before that Christmas. My cousin and I were both pregnant at the same time, and we were at my mother's for an "end of summer" party.
Mom appeared out of nowhere, handed each of us a bag, and said that she thought we might want them. I looked inside mine, and nearly cried.
Buried under a couple pair of pajamas for the baby, was a hand made quilt by my grandmother. Each and every child in my family can boast that they had a gram quilt made for them, including my little one. Somehow, she had 2 spare quilts lying around, along with 4 pair of pajamas. Her usual gift to anyone with a baby on the way in the family.
My son has never touched that quilt, and he never will. It's the last piece of her that I have, and I'm refusing to let it go. As a matter of fact, I keep it in a spot on the wall next to my computer so I can see it.
Sometimes I think I smell her, or feel her watching me. More often than not I dream of her, and she's always telling me to straighten up and use my head. Even if she's brow-beating me in my dreams, I always wake up refreshed, with a different perspective on things.
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Even with all of the drama and horrible things happening that year, my pregnancy was going alright. As I neared 26 weeks, I started getting scared. Worrying incessantly whether the baby would make it past that mark, or if it would be Keegan all over again.
My high risk doctor knew my history, including what happened with Keegan. And somehow, he planned to keep things calm from my 24th week on, without my knowledge until my 24th week appointment.

To be continued....

Mixed Nuts

2007-12-22T16:10:00.000-08:00

I have been M.I.A. for a few days, and the insanity of having to keep my thoughts to myself is literally killing me! Okay, well it's not killing me, but those avid bloggers out there know what I'm talking about. So here are a bunch of random things from the past few days, all in one.

~*~The other day while at my sister's, Chiquita, we got into a discussion about how people roll their toilet paper. She had a spare roll in her kitchen, and proceeded to demonstrate how she unwound her T.P. from the roll. Made me think about how I mentally count how many times my hand has gone around the roll without realizing it. So, my sister, my niece, and myself all had rolls of T.P. wrapped around our hands, and Chiquita had the grand idea that we should set it inside the tube for when one of the kids needed it for something useless, that way we weren't wasting it. I was being a smart ass, so I held it up to my nose and pretended to start blowing it. She flipped out on me, and I started laughing. Unfortunately, I was sort of using my nose at the moment I chose to laugh, so spit flew out from the corners of my mouth and around the T.P. It managed to whack her squarely in the neck. I went home that night feeling victorious. She scrubbed her neck with bleach.~*~

~*~I dropped in to visit a friend of mine the other day that I talk to on rare occasions (She called after I found her on Myspace and sent her a message). She told me that she had lost some weight. Now, this girl has always been built like me. Heavy, wide bone structure that miraculously weighs a ton. So I was figuring that she might have went down a size or two in jeans. She met me outside when I got there, and I turned green with envy. She's thin. I now hate her. And it gives me more reason to work harder on my New Year's Resolution to lose weight in 2008. She and I have looked alike both body wise and facial wise for as long as I can remember, and since she lost weight, we only look alike in the face now. I won't let that happen. I'm off to join her at a wonderful size 9. I hate you Shannon. I really do!~*~

~*~This one has been on my mind for days, literally. Shortly before I started blogging, T-Bone was getting ready to leave for work. I was in the kitchen getting his lunch ready, and BuckWheat was running around the house like a wild animal. T-Bone walked into the kitchen, with BuckWheat nearly rammed up his behind. He thought he would be funny, so he pulled up short and kind of stuck his rear out at the same time. BuckWheat is just the right height for his mouth to have landed squarely in the regions of his rump where the sun don't shine. And his mouth was wide open. He not only fell over from the impact, but lay on the floor stunned for nearly 15 seconds before T-Bone could get him up. And when my lovely husband turned around to rescue his baby from the floor (where he put him in the first place) I noticed that he had a huge, wet, BuckWheat sized mouth print in the precise spot where it shouldn't have been. I laughed so hard I nearly pee'd, and wished for a camera. No such luck. T-Bone headed out to work that way, praying that it would dry before he got to work. BuckWheat now keeps a safe distance from T-Bone when he's screaming through the house so he can stop before colliding.~*~

~*~T-Bone and I went Christmas shopping today. We managed to get everyone but our children entirely done, which is a nice accomplishment for our very unorganized selves. Our gift to each other was a nice digital camera. NOT the one that we were aiming for, because, of course, odds are that when you actually have the money to buy something it will never, ever, ever be in stock. That was the case here. So I saw another that I liked, and the only one they had was a display model. So I got a 4 year warranty with it, plus $10 off. Even with the $45 warranty price, I still paid what I would have for the camera alone that I wanted. So it was an okay-ish deal. Here's a pic that we took in front of the tree this afternoon...
Have I ever told you that I love the way he looks without his glasses? *sigh* I won't go into that here though. Don't need my readers thinking that this is some porn related blog. I mean, it could be. But I will spare you for now.

And yes, I look miserable. I hate pics. I really do. But I do have a couple of good ones of me on here somewhere. Hmm.. let me see what I can dig up.. how about this?
I actually think it's an awful pic. The cold weather had turned my face red and blown my hair around. And I'm not good at taking pics of myself. But I figured I could have shared worse. Lots worse. I have many pics that fall under the lots worse category.

And here is one of me and T-Bone...

He actually just e-mailed me and told me how much he hated this one. Said that his nose looks big in it. I didn't disagree, just told him that my new camera doesn't have a function to make his nose smaller. I think he was miffed over that. But really, his nose looks so much better after he had a nose job. I promised not to tell anyone about that. So shhh.. I didn't mention it.

Of course, here's T-Bone and BuckWheat at Tully's today. We dropped in for lunch. Loved the atmosphere. The food wasn't bad, but I couldn't get over their sloppy presentation. It was just... odd. I'm used to food looking nice and neat when you go to a restaurant. It was still good though!

And lastly, I promise, is a pic of me with BuckWheat. It was taken at my computer desk, and of course, he wasn't liking the mommy snuggles and was trying to get away. I mean, come on little boy! I carried your rotten, heavy, squirmy, seed-of-satan butt for nearly 9 months, the least you could do is show me the love!!

~*~Just have to share this, T-Bone e-mailed me from work a bit ago with it and I thought it was hilarious, and so fitting for the backwards, upstate, NY town that he works in.

A winter statistic ..........

96% OF AMERICANS SAY "OH SHIT" BEFORE GOING IN THE DITCH ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.

THE OTHER 4% ARE FROM UPSTATE NEW YORK AND THEY SAY, "HOLD MY BEER AND WATCH THIS."

Enjoy your Holiday Season!

Fried PorkChop

I'm Like Sasquatch...

Netflix, anyone?

Laugh, I Thought I Would Die!

Q & A, Hooray!

BAAAAAADDDD Blogger

Spring Has Sprung

It's Raining, It's Pouring, & A Winner!

Reflections, with a Twist (Read on!)

About Me

Back In the Saddle Again

Menu... Interrupted

My Fall From Psychotic Pt. 8

If I Were...

Annie Annie Bo Bannie...

I'm Done, and I Won It

What These Say About Me

Menu Plan Monday 3/3-3/10

Hoo-Ha Shenanigans

Getaway Recap

Giveaways Galore!

Oscars Schmoscars...Gimme a Book!!!***CONTEST***

Signs, Signs, Everywhere There's Signs

Menu Plan Monday 2/28-3/6

Food... Glorious... Meme?

And He Hated Me for Good Reason...

Weird Things About Me Tag

Menu Plan Monday (Belated)

Twisted T-Bone

Menu Plan WhatDay?

Convo One Liners

Lonely Is As Lonely Does

How Others See You

Menu Plan Monday 1/31-2/7

I Just Gotta Say...

Mixed Nuts 1/24-2/2

Random Stuffs

Menu Plan Monday 1/31-2/7

My First Blog Award!

Sonny Conversations

He's My Man

Childhood Dreams; Shattered

Got Me Some Header!

Menu Plan Monday 1/24-1/31

Sometimes I Wonder...

Super Freak Friday

7 Things I Hate (Random)

Am I the Only One?

'Cuz I Get On Your Nerves

Fat-10, Annie-0

Blog Promotion Day!

Mixed Nuts 1/10-1/17

Menu Plan Monday 1/17-1/24

May They R.I.P.

Menu Plan Monday 1/10-1/17

Win A Hamilton Beach® Stand Mixer!

Is It Even Possible??

Bracelets & Caricatures, How Can You Go Wrong With These?

Never Leave...

'Cuz You Look Like A Monkey...

Menu Plan Monday 1/3-1/10

Love Free Stuff? Share Your Funnies, and Win It!

My Fall From Psychotic Pt. 7

Mixed Nuts

Oscars Schmoscars...Gimme a Book!!!CONTEST